


Into the Light

by Jeanie205



Series: The Return [2]
Category: The 100
Genre: Canon verse, Eventual mild semi-smut, F/M, bellarke reunion, sequel to Out of the Darkness, they finally make it down from the ring
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-17
Updated: 2017-07-22
Packaged: 2018-12-02 23:32:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 22,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11519823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jeanie205/pseuds/Jeanie205
Summary: Sequel to "Out of the Darkness," which covers their first 2 1/2 years in space.  This story picks up a year later.  While Bellamy can hear Clarke's daily messages, he has no way of responding, and he's desperate to be able to send her a message.  But he also understands it's more important to find a way to get back to the planet, and they've run into all sorts of obstacles.  But Bellamy will never give up on getting back to Clarke.  And, oh, yeah, how does that Eligius mining ship fit in?  It's a reunion fic, so you can definitely expect some eventual Bellarke.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> While you don't have to read the previous fic, I would recommend it. It's shorter, only a one-shot. This one has four chapters, but they're all written and they'll be posted within a few days.

_It’s a beautiful day today, Bellamy. I wish you’d been here with me to watch the sun rise. Can’t wait until you’re all back on the ground. 1298 days and counting._

That had been today’s transmission from Clarke, sent in the early morning. For a long time now, messages like this had been enough to keep him going. Hearing her voice, knowing she was alive after all - Bellamy had been feasting on those crumbs for more than a year.

But today, for some reason, it just hadn’t been enough.

It had been building in him, he realized, this need to respond, to ask questions. To let Clarke know that at least for the moment, they, too, were okay up there on the Ark. But at the moment, he could do none of those things. Bellamy’s frustration was suddenly in full bloom and he was unable to contain it.

“Raven,” he said at dinner that night, “uh…I’m almost afraid to bring this up, considering what happened the last time, but...”

His voice trailed off and Raven eyed him suspiciously.

“Just spit it out,” she snapped, impatient.

Bellamy’s mouth quirked and he shrugged. If they all got pissed off again, so be it, but he’d avoided the subject for a long time and he wasn’t waiting another day.

“Isn’t it time to start trying to build our own comms? So we can talk to Clarke? Maybe ask questions about the bunker? After all, wouldn’t some information be helpful while we’re making a plan to get back to Earth?”

Bellamy had steeled himself for Raven’s expected protests, for her arguments. Perhaps even her derision. What he hadn’t prepared for was her agreement.

She nodded sharply. “You’re right on both counts. We need to start figuring out how we’re gonna get back to the ground, and for that we need information.”

Echo had been listening to the exchange closely and now she frowned in confusion.

“Aren’t we going back the same way we got here? In the rocket? I mean, I know you were worried about the fuel…”

Raven smiled. Echo had been a pretty good physics student, but apparently not quite good enough.

“We can’t actually use the rocket to get back. Rockets are good for going up into space, but not so good for getting back. We need a different sort of transport. Something that will be able to land safely on the ground.”

Raven looked around the table as five heads nodded.

“And what would that look like?” Echo persisted.

Raven sighed. “Well, a shuttle would be nice. Something that could descend through the atmosphere and then glide into a safe landing on the ground. Like an airplane.”

Echo’s brows drew together, and Bellamy watched her trying to recall his lessons on air transport.

Raven saw the look and smiled. “Don’t bother trying to come up with a mental image, Echo. We have no shuttles here.”

“So…what was the original plan for the return trip with the rocket, then? If it couldn’t land, I mean. There must have been one, right?”

Raven smiled. “Yes, there was one. There’s a pod inside the rocket that’s meant to be the landing ship. But there are a couple of problems. First, I’ve looked it over and it was damaged during the flight here. Maybe because of the retrofit. And then, even if I could fix it, it’s…well, it’s still not big enough for seven passengers.”

Bellamy saw the shock he felt at her statement mirrored in the others.

Raven frowned. “Yeah, it’s a pisser, all right. But don’t get too depressed about that part, because there’s still the question of fuel, anyway.”

Monty opened his mouth and Bellamy was sure he’d been about to say something, but Harper rushed in first.

“Can we at least a look at the descent pod? Maybe there’s a way we can retrofit it, just like we did the rocket,” she insisted optimistically.

“I’ve already calculated it a dozen times. And besides, we still have no fuel.” Raven sighed. “But I suppose we can take a look after dinner.”

Twenty minutes later, they were traipsing around the ring towards the hangar, an area they rarely visited.

“Raven,” Bellamy said quietly, tugging her back, letting the others pass. “Why didn’t you tell me about this before? That there was a space issue in the landing pod?”

Raven shrugged. “I just…I figured I’d cross that bridge when…you know…”

He sighed quietly. “I’m pretty sure that bridge is on the horizon and getting closer every day.”

Bellamy understood that Raven knew a hell of a lot more about this stuff than he ever would, but he’d also thought they were a team. And secrets didn’t exactly inspire trust. He tried his best to let it go.

“We’ll figure it out. Dammit, Raven” he hissed, “if Clarke can survive praimfaya, and make it all this time more or less on her own, I’m not letting a little thing like…like…leg room stop me from getting back to her.”

He knew his determination must have sounded a little crazed when she smirked, saluted him smartly and said, “Aye, aye, cap’n.”

“Shut up,” he grinned, poking her in the ribs.

By the time they reached the hangar, his resolve had become steely, but when they went inside the rocket and found the descent pod, it weakened considerably. The pod had clearly been built for two, and he could see that it might be retrofitted to accommodate perhaps four passengers, but certainly no more. Definitely not seven.

Would they be forced into another lottery? Another culling? Just the thought made him shudder.

Echo studied the pod curiously, walking all around it, and then her head began to nod.

“Seven people would never fit inside this small space,” she declared, as though that weren’t the exact premise that they’d started with.

Raven snorted in exasperation. “No duh! What do you think I’ve been trying to tell you?”

Echo shrugged. “Then I don’t see why you wouldn’t use one of the others. One of the bigger ones.”

“Others? What others? Monty,” Raven turned to him, the expression on her face one enormous confused frown, “do you know what the hell she’s talking about?”

When he shook his head, Raven swung back toward Echo impatiently. “I don’t see any other pods.”

“Not here,” Echo sounded equally exasperated. “I mean the ones in…in there.” Her arm waved in the general direction of the ring.

“Exactly where…in there?”

“You don’t know about them?” Echo was clearly perplexed. “They were in one of the rooms I went through looking for debris. Somewhere…” Her voice trailed off vaguely.

“Echo,” Bellamy deemed it a good time to get involved. “Can you show us where these pods are?”

Her expression became uncertain.

“I’m not sure…”

That wasn’t cutting it with Murphy.

“What the fuck, Echo? You must have some idea where you saw this stuff. Unless you’re just making it the hell up!”

In all their time together, they’d mostly managed to avoid coming to blows, but the few times it had happened it hadn’t been pretty. So Bellamy laid a calming hand on Echo’s shoulder as she began to tense, and answered Murphy himself. “If Echo says she saw pods while she was clearing out all the junk, then she did. It makes sense she wouldn’t have known what they were. Why don’t we divide the ring into a rough grid? We can split up and start a search tomorrow.”

“Fuck tomorrow!” Murphy was as determined and impatient as ever. “I’m starting right now.”

Bellamy could see in their faces that it would be useless to argue, and in truth, he was just as anxious to find out if these phantom pods really did exist. “Okay,” he nodded. “Let’s give it a few hours tonight, and if we don’t find anything we can pick up again tomorrow.”

It was the work of a very few minutes to decide who should search where. Bellamy divided the ring into only six roughly equal segments, because for as much as Raven wanted to be one of the searchers, Bellamy convinced her to let them find the damn things first. Then she could make her way to wherever they happened to be. She wasn’t happy about it, but she knew it made the most sense.

They didn’t find the pods that night, or the next day. Or even the next. But on the third day, Echo found them, just where she’d seen them last, nearly 180 degrees around the ring from the section they occupied, and tucked into an interior room whose door was nearly invisible.

“I remember being surprised there was another room back there,” Echo told them, after she’d alerted the group and they’d assembled to check out her find. “I had a hard time opening the door.”

It was Raven who finally figured it out.

“This must have been the training room,” she told them, wide-eyed. “I’d just been cleared by Sinclair to work in zero-g when Jaha sent down the drop ship and then everything went all to hell. Otherwise, I’d have known all about this room. Probably would have been training in here myself, I suppose, but I never got the chance.”

She moved closer, peering at one of the pods, her frustration evident as her game leg kept her from climbing up the side and through the door.

“We’ll have to set up some kind of scaffolding, but for now, Bellamy, can you give me a boost so I can check it out?”

Bellamy picked her up and set her on a lower platform, and from there she was able to scramble up and slip inside. He was on pins and needles until her head popped back around the door. The shit-eating grin told him everything he needed to know.

“Yeah?” he asked, brows raised, his voice and his smile tentative until he’d heard it with his own ears.

“Yep,” Raven said with a blast of her old confidence. “I can work with this.”

Bellamy helped her down amid the whoops and cheers of their friends, and she stood there for a moment before finally whistling them all to silence.

“Will you guys shut the fuck up for a minute! I said I can do it, but I didn’t say it would be easy and I didn’t say it would be fast. The basic components are there - navigation, propulsion, life support - but it was still only a training module. So first I have to figure out how to modify it and then find the shit we need to make that happen.”

“Hey, when it comes to finding tech, I’ve had a whole lot of experience,” Emori reminded her. “If what you need is anywhere in this pile of crap, I’ll find it.”

Raven nodded. “I’ll hold you to that. And,” she added, turning to Monty, “there’s still the problem of the fuel.”

“Yeah, well, I’ve been working on that,” he said. “I’ve had some ideas about using the waste from our food supply to make fuel.” Monty paused, shrugged. “I wasn’t sure we’d ever really need it so working out the formula hasn’t been a priority.”

“Well, make it a priority.”

Raven leaned against the bottom of the pod, and Bellamy could see on her face how tiring the expedition around the ring had been. But he could also read the elation. They were going to get the fuck off the Ark, and she was personally going to make it happen.

“Tomorrow,” she said now, as she stood before them, filled with determination, “we start to make the plans. For everything. What we need to do to make the pod viable. The fuel. How we’ll get it out of this room and down to the hangar.”

Bellamy could feel the electricity in the air. They had purpose now. A goal. The end was in sight. They’d get off that damn ring or die trying.

He hoped it would never have to come to that.

“But tonight,” Raven continued, pushing away from the pod, “we celebrate. I hope you got some prime moonshine, Monty, because I’m feeling a real thirst here.”

“Yeah, right, Reyes,” Murphy interjected. “You’re such a lightweight. One drink and you’ll be out cold.”

“Well, then give me that one drink!” she insisted amid their laughter and Monty’s assurances that his moonshine was always prime.

“Here, hop on my back,” Bellamy said, squatting slightly. “Tomorrow I’ll try to rig something up so you won’t have to walk all this way, but for tonight, you’ll have to make do with my personal transport.”

The others had already turned to leave, and for a moment Bellamy thought Raven was going to take his offer of help and throw it back in his face. But then she gave a quiet sigh, and climbed onto his back.

“Well, then, move it along, Blake. I’m getting thirstier by the second.”

As he made his way around the ring to their quarters, Bellamy recalled, not for the first time, that while their search for the pods had consumed them, they’d never gotten back to his original question. The subject in which he was most interested.

He carefully lowered his passenger to her feet outside their common room and then asked quickly, “So, what about the comms, Raven? We never got back to that discussion, but I seem to remember you agreed we needed to work on them.”

Raven was quiet as she eyed him sympathetically. After a moment, she gave her head a small shake.

“I can’t do both, Bellamy. It’s going to take a ton of planning, and effort, and materials, and just plain time to make the escape pod happen. I can’t get that done and figure out a way to build some comms, too.”

“Well, then, maybe Monty…”

“Is working on the fuel. And even if he figures out a successful process, it’s going to take all the time we have left to build up enough of a supply. Besides…with his hands…” Raven shook her head. “My gimpy leg is a pain in the ass, but at least I can still use my hands. Building comms would be painstaking, delicate work, and I don’t think that Monty is …up to it.”

Bellamy was silent, trying to accept it, trying to absorb his disappointment. He clenched his fists, looked away, worked very hard at not punching any walls. _Christ! He was a grown man, not a kid. He_ _should be able to deal with this._ But it still felt like a heavy blow.

Raven grabbed his hands, forcing his attention back to her.

“Bellamy,” she said, squeezing tightly, “I know how much you want to talk to her.” Perhaps she saw something of what he was feeling in his face then, because she amended that statement immediately. “Okay. Maybe I don’t really understand how much being able to communicate with Clarke would mean to you, but it still doesn’t make any difference.”

She reached up, tipped his chin down, forced him to look her in the eye.

“We’ll get to the comms eventually, but right now I can’t do both,” she reiterated. “And anyway, isn’t finding a way to get back to Clarke a lot more important than just being able to talk to her?”

Raven’s logic was unassailable. Bellamy understood that. And even if she’d been willing to take valuable time away from getting the pod ready just to build some comms, it would be incredibly selfish of him to ask her to do that.

Not that all of them wouldn’t have been happy to have a working comm link, but he was the desperate one. The one who was fed up after a year of being on the receiving end of a one-way conversation. The one who needed to let Clarke know that he heard her, that he understood her, and that he was coming home.

Bellamy sighed. No doubt Raven was right. Better to just come home.

XXXXXXXXXX

 

It was going to be damn hard work. All of it. And it wasn’t going to happen overnight.

The basic bones of the pods were good, Raven had assured them, because the Ark engineers had been just as brilliant as everyone else who worked in GoSci.

Raven had wondered at first why the training pods hadn’t actually been in GoSci, which had been a part of Alpha Station where a lot of the big-shot scientists lived. But then she figured that the pods just took up too damn much space. It had probably been easier to build them way out on the ring in a spot that wasn’t needed for more mundane activities. A spot where zero-g mechanics could train in relative obscurity and quiet. And could then pass that training on to the next generation, until finally the time would come for the brave few to start exploring the planet below. Seeing if, at last, it was habitable.

“Hah!” Raven said, as she expounded this theory to Bellamy the first day they began to draft their descent plan. “The failure of the Ark’s air system turned all that careful planning for the future into a big pile of crap. So instead of a bunch of highly-trained engineers, it was 100 delinquents who had to save the day. Plus,” she added with a smirk, “you. The stowaway.”

Bellamy huffed a laugh. “And you, the hot-shot mechanic, come down to see if we were still alive.”

“Yeah, well you kind of put a crimp in that plan, if I recall.”

“I did,” he agreed ruefully. “I was a real asshole.”

Raven patted his arm. “You know you weren‘t to blame for all the shit that went down on the Ark, Bellamy. And besides, you might have redeemed yourself once or twice since then.”

She looked down at the paper in front of her, tapping her pencil on the list they’d been working on for hours. “In any case, we don’t really have time for this cheery trip down memory lane. Not if we want to finish making the plan so we can start working on some of this shit.”

“So, then,” he nodded, picking up where they’d left off. “Good bones.”

“Yep. The basic pods are sound. But they were for training, and never meant to actually hurtle through space.”

“And this means?”

“That while the operational components are probably still intact - or at least I can fix them up to work right - we may have some structural problems. I can test the metal on the outer shell, but I’m almost positive it wouldn’t stand up to the heat of Earth’s upper atmosphere.”

“So we’d be toast.”

“Quite literally. Yep.”

“But you have a plan.”

“Of course. I’m pretty sure we can cannibalize sections of the outermost part of the ring without compromising its integrity. But…I’ll need your help.”

“With…?”

When Raven sighed, Bellamy wondered what the hell it was she wanted him to do.

“You’re maybe not gonna like it.”

“Raven!”

“Okay, okay. We need to go out and cut away enough heat-resistant panels to cover the pod.”

It took a moment for her meaning to sink in. But when it did…

“Go out…as in… _go out into fucking space?_ ” He could hear the horror in his voice as he felt the blood drain from his face.

Raven sighed. “I was afraid you might have that reaction. But the thing is, Bellamy, lasering enormous metal sheets away from the superstructure and then carting them back inside is not something I can handle by myself. It’s a two-person job.” She shrugged. “And who the hell else should I ask?”

“Shit.” The last thing Bellamy ever thought he’d be doing was walking in space.

“Jesus, Blake! You make it sound like I’m sending you to your doom. Spacewalking is awesome! Besides, you’ve had to do a lot scarier things. It’s a fucking miracle you ever made it out of Mount Weather alive.”

Bellamy shook his head. Logically, he knew that she was probably right. That spacewalking had been common on the Ark for needed repairs. That they’d be tethered. That Raven would be with him. That it was actually a lot safer than almost every damn thing he’d had to do on the ground. But still. Something about it just gave him the creeps.

Raven frowned and played her last card. “Uh…you do still want to get back to Clarke, right?”

Bellamy sighed, resigned to his fate.

They’d found a half-dozen canisters of oxygen among the useless debris on the ring. So far Raven had used up most of one of them making necessary repairs to the Ark and repositioning their communication satellite, the very thing that had allowed them to receive Clarke’s transmissions and to learn that she’d somehow miraculously survived. But now there’d be two of them spacewalking, two of them using up their dwindling supply of canned oxygen. Bellamy understood they couldn’t afford to waste any of it.

“I suppose you know the best place to get what we need.”

Raven nodded. “I’ve been studying the plans for this tin can, and there are some redundancies in the superstructure, probably the result of the overlapping of the space stations when the Ark was first combined. I think we can just about reach it with the tethers.”

“Just about?” Bellamy could hear the uncertainty in his own voice. He knew without ever before having given it a thought that spacewalking was never going to be his thing.

Raven grinned. “You’ll survive,” she promised.

XXXXXXXXXX

_Madi was sad today, Bellamy, and I didn’t know how to comfort her. I kept thinking about you and Octavia, how much you must have done to make her feel happy and safe for all those years on the Ark. Will I ever get the hang of parenting? I wish you were around to give me some pointers. 1400 days down, 425 to go._

When that one had come in, all Bellamy could think about was how much he wished he were there, too. Now that the end was in sight, their years of separation nearly over, Bellamy knew his anxiety should be lessening. But the truth was that it was exactly the opposite. With only a year left to go of their five-year exile from the ground, and the reconstruction of the escape pod well in hand, he was somehow more apprehensive than ever.

Building their getaway vehicle was proving to be a long and tedious process. It had taken Raven and him several weeks of carefully planned spacewalking to cut away and then haul into the ring enough high-density heat shield to cover the exterior of the pod. Plus a little extra, because as Raven kept reminding him, you just never fucking knew.

For a while, Bellamy had been so awkward out in space that Raven complained they’d run out of oxygen long before the mission was completed. But as he eventually became more adept, their efficiency increased, and they finished the job with two tanks left, each half full of oxygen.

Transporting the bulky and incredibly heavy metal proved more problematic once they left the vacuum of space for the gravity-laden ring. The sheets were so heavy, in fact, that they off-loaded them only as far as the hangar. After Raven modified the pod’s operating systems for actual space travel, they’d have to somehow maneuver the pod around the ring to the hangar, and attach the outer plating there. Then it would be moved through the airlock to the launch deck.

Weight and bulk also entered into Raven’s decision-making process about which of the two available training pods they’d retrofit.

“The one nearest the door,” she’d told Bellamy with a shrug when he asked. “It’s going to be hard enough to shift the thing. Why move it even one foot further than we have to?”

While Raven was in her element poring over schematics and fixing up mechanical systems, to Bellamy, it was the most mind-numbingly boring task he’d ever undertaken, save perhaps for his stint as a janitor on the Ark. Nevertheless, getting the pod ready had become everyone’s top priority, and they all lent Raven whatever assistance she required without a murmur.

Raven’s work on the modifications went on for months and had begun to seem never-ending, until with almost startling abruptness she suddenly declared that she was finished. _Done with the innards_ was how she put it, announcing it casually over dinner one evening. After an initial moment of shock, the others whooped for joy, deciding the occasion called for a party.

Over cups of moonshine, Raven and Monty began brainstorming methods of moving the pod around the ring to the hangar where it’s outer hull lay in enormous sheets, waiting to be attached. The more of Monty’s prime moonshine they consumed, the more fantastical became their preferred methods of transport.

“Pretty sure _fucking ALIE_ left me with some telekinetic powers,” Raven proclaimed. “I’m just gonna _think_ that sucker around to the hangar.”

Monty banged his cup against hers as though in agreement, while at the same time insisting that what they really ought to do was slingshot the thing through space, sending it out the training room hatch and somehow, using the exact right calculations, it would come sailing back into the hangar.

When the two of them began to argue over how to make the calculations for Monty’s plan, Bellamy chuckled and took himself off to bed. As he lay on his cot a few minutes later, he finally let himself feel the excitement he’d managed to keep at bay ever since Raven had made her announcement.

They were on the last step of retrofitting the pod for space travel and it had been going well. There were still ten months left before they could safely return to the ground, and he couldn’t imagine that plating the outer hull would take that long. So as far as he could tell, they were ahead of schedule. They’d be done with the escape pod and Raven would have some free time.

Bellamy was almost afraid to hope that she could then afford the time to work on the comms he so desperately wanted.

He recalled the message that Clarke had sent that very morning. Bellamy had known almost from the beginning that she was an extraordinary person, but he continued to be astonished at how upbeat Clarke’s messages were on most days.

But not that morning. And he’d perfectly understood her concerns.

 _Yesterday was a tough one, Bellamy. Madi’s getting older and I have to let her do some things on her own, but it’s so damn hard. She was gone for hours. When she finally got back, she was so proud that she’d found a new growth of berries and even filled a huge sack with them. And all I wanted to do was crush her to me and tell her she was never going away for that long again. But I didn’t. Maybe when you come down in…less than a year now…you can tell me how you were able to let Octavia train as a warrior without losing your mind_.

Dammit! She needed him. Not in ten months, but right fucking now! He knew in his bones that he could help her, if only they had a way to communicate.

And he damn well needed her. That had never gone away. He doubted now that it ever would.

Still, as Bellamy drifted off, he was buoyed by the certainty that the pod would be finished in a matter of weeks. That Raven would finally have the time to build the comms. That within a few months, he’d be talking to Clarke instead of just listening to her. And that soon after that he’d be seeing her, touching her. Bellamy’s lips turned up and his eyes closed as he pictured the blue of her eyes and the radiance of her smile.

He slept.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just when a return to the ground seemed within their grasp, when all Bellamy and the others had to do was wait out the five years, they suffer a serious setback. And then they run into another unexpected complication. But they'll keep forging ahead, because they all want nothing more than to get home, and Bellamy wants nothing more than to get back to Clarke.

The explosion was so loud it shook Bellamy awake. He grabbed for his pants and was out the door within seconds.

“What the fuck was that?” Murphy cried, emerging at a run from the room opposite, but as they raced down the hallway and around the ring, Bellamy knew they probably felt the exact same dread.

Echo caught up with them before they’d made it a quarter of the way around, and that’s when he saw the smoke.

“Fuck!” He knew it had to be the pod.

By the time the three of them reached the training room, smoke was pouring through the doorway, which had been left open for ease of access. The fire itself, however, was confined to the one room. Indeed, to the one pod. But that pod was fully engulfed.

“Grab that one!” he yelled to Murphy, pointing to the fire extinguisher at the far end of the hallway, while he ripped another from its holder in the alcove behind him. When Echo turned toward him in wordless panic, Bellamy cocked his head toward the other end of the hall.

When they’d lived on the Ark the first time, fire had always been the most serious potential disaster, so there’d been multiple extinguishers in every corridor. But Bellamy was unsure exactly how much fire retardant might be left in any of them.

He dashed into the room and pressed the trigger, relief coursing through him when foam began to spurt out onto the flaming pod. Murphy appeared at his right elbow and Echo on his left, and white spume was now enveloping the flames from every direction.

He’d run out without so much as a t-shirt, so Bellamy threw his forearm across his nose and mouth, trying to inhale as little as possible as he battled through the thick smoke to the opposite side of the pod. He sprayed furiously, finally assuring himself that no sparks remained.

It was all over in a matter of seconds.

As he coughed his way back out to the hallway, Bellamy doubted that more than five minutes had passed from the time he’d been woken by the explosion until the moment he stood there outside the training room staring at the charred ruins of their dashed hopes. He turned when he heard the others arrive, and he could see by their gobsmacked expressions that they were all equally in shock.

“Is it out?” Raven croaked, leaning her bum leg against the wall.

Bellamy nodded, coughing harshly. “It’s out. We need to let the smoke dissipate before we can see what’s left. Or try to figure out why the hell it happened.”

“Come on, then,” Harper nodded to him, “I want to check out that cough.”

He began to shake his head. “Gotta stay and make sure the fire doesn’t start up again.”

“I will stay,” Echo offered. “I did not breathe in the smoke, Bellamy. You should let Harper take care of you.”

“Right,” he said, his feet feeling like lead as he followed Harper back to the medical room.

“I think you should take some oxygen, Bellamy,” Harper said, pulling out one of their two precious oxygen tanks.

“No!” he rasped, his cough returning. “We need to save those for when we leave this hellhole!”

Harper sighed. “Okay,” she said, returning the tank to a shelf. “At least let me check your blood and treat your burns.”

“Burns?”

Harper’s eyes narrowed as she indicated a pattern of tiny red singe marks across his chest, as well as along the forearm that he’d used to protect himself from the worst of the smoke. It was only when he noticed them that they began to sting. _Adrenalin_ , he thought wryly. _I’ve been here before._

He sat patiently while Harper drew blood and dressed his burns, then dragged himself back to his quarters, sinking tiredly onto the bed. He felt exhausted, but within minutes Bellamy knew he wasn’t going to be able to sleep. He pulled on a shirt and headed toward their common room, finding the rest gathered around a table in dispirited silence.

“You okay?” Monty asked.

Bellamy shrugged tiredly. “I’m in a lot better shape than our escape pod.”

The long silence that followed was interrupted when Murphy banged his fist on the table, startling them all.

“What the hell do we do now?” he shouted, his anger all the more intense for having no real focus.

Bellamy closed his eyes, too tired to respond.

“John,” Emori said quietly, squeezing his arm, “this isn’t helping.” She turned toward Raven. “We still have the other pod, right?”

Raven shrugged. “It didn’t seem to be damaged, but I’ll need to take a better look. And assuming we have enough material left to fix it.” She paused. “And…if I can figure out how the hell I screwed up with the first one.”

“What makes you think you screwed up?” Monty asked. “We have no idea what started that fire.”

“Yeah? Well, they sat there for five fucking years without catching on fire, but then as soon as I get my paws on them, they go up in flames. It has to be something I did.”

“Or it wasn’t,” Bellamy said quietly. “Isn’t there a recording device somewhere in that rubble? Something that might tell us what happened?”

Raven straightened. “Yep, there was one in place, if it isn’t burnt to a cinder.”

“They’re made to withstand extraordinary heat, Raven,” Monty reminded her. “Otherwise, there wouldn’t be much point in having them.”

Bellamy nodded, a plan beginning to take shape in his head.

“Okay, then,” he said. “So tomorrow, we start carefully sifting through the debris. First priority? Find the recording. After that, Raven can do her thing while the rest of us clean up.”

“Fuck tomorrow,” Murphy said, jumping out of seat. “I’m starting right now.”

“Sit down, Murphy,” Bellamy said in a tone he rarely used anymore. “None of us have had more than a couple of hours sleep. I don’t want us throwing the damn thing away by mistake because we’re too tired to see straight.”

To Bellamy’s relief, Murphy subsided. But he knew Murphy wasn’t the only one who was angry and discouraged. Hell, he felt that way himself.

“Look,” he said. “I’m not gonna try to sugarcoat the fact that our escape pod just burnt to a crisp. Or tell you that months of hard work didn’t just go up in smoke. So, yeah, we’re gonna have to start all over again.”

“No shit!” Murphy growled, still venting his anger.

Bellamy ignored him, hoping instead to drive home his point. “But Emori is right. At least we have another pod. It’s just a few feet further from the door, and by some miracle, it looks like we managed to put out the fire before it was damaged. And the pieces of heat shield that I sweated my balls to get on those fucking spacewalks are still waiting in the hangar. They’re just as good as ever.”

Bellamy sighed.

“Yeah, there’s a good chance we aren’t going to be done by the end of the five years. Believe me, no one hates that more than I do. They…they aren’t gonna know what’s happened to us, and that really sucks.”

Bellamy tried to clear his dry, smoke-ravaged throat.

“But we _will_ get it done. After all the shit we’ve been through, after the grounder wars and Mount Weather, after ALIE and praimfaya, we’re not gonna let something as simple as a fire defeat us. We’ll work together, just like we’ve been doing since we got here. Raven will figure out what happened, and then she’ll run a hundred tests to make sure the new pod is safe. She’ll fix it up, and we’ll help her, and it’ll go faster this time because we’ve done it all before. And when we’re done, we’ll get off this tin can and go back where we belong. Because that’s _our_ fucking planet down there, and we’re damn well getting back to it.”

He watched as their faces seemed to clear a bit, as their eyes became less haunted, and their backs just a little less rigid. Bellamy hoped it was enough, because he knew if he tried to say even one more fucking word, he’d begin coughing uncontrollably.

Harper eyed him warily, pouring him a small amount of their precious water supply, insisting with her raised brows and tight mouth that he drink every drop.

Echo arrived just then, startling him a bit as he realized he’d forgotten for the moment that she’d stayed behind.

“There are no more hot spots,” she reported. “It’s safe to leave it.”

Bellamy nodded, and without another word they all retreated to their beds.

XXXXXXXXXX

“It was an O-ring. A stupid shitty little piece of hardware that didn’t quite fit because the asshole who made it wasn’t paying attention to his job. I left the propulsion diagnostic running that night and…boom!”

Raven had been studying the computer download of the incident for days, and Bellamy was relieved that she’d finally isolated the cause of the explosion. From the way she was huffing and puffing, he was pretty sure that if the slacker who’d made the O-ring had been standing there, Raven would have kicked him to hell and gone, brace or no brace.

“So does this mean we can get started on retrofitting the other pod?”

Raven frowned. “Well, you’re pretty damn chill about it, considering how much time that one stupid part is costing us,” she complained.

He shrugged. “I’m just glad the part decided to blow here, instead of when we were on our way back to the ground. So I guess you’ll be looking to make sure the hardware in the other pod wasn’t made by the same asshole?”

“Like you said last week, I’ll be running tests on every nut and bolt, on every process and every system.”

He nodded. “Then let’s get to it.”

After that, a calm seemed to settle over them. They began the work on the second pod with slow deliberation, as Raven carefully checked and rechecked their progress each step of the way. With work moving along painstakingly but smoothly over the next few months, Bellamy began to think that while they wouldn’t make the five-year target, they’d be ready not long after.

It felt good to finally be on the home stretch. To know that the thousands of miles of space between where he was and where he wanted to be were about to disappear. That the long separation would soon be over.

And that’s when something wholly unexpected happened.

It was Monty who heard it first. Heard _them_ first.

Clarke had already transmitted that day, and her message had been of the upbeat variety.

_When I woke up this morning, Bellamy, I had such a strong feeling of your presence. I know there’s a good reason why you haven’t answered in all this time. And it’s not…it’s not because you’re dead. I’ve never known why I feel so connected to you, but I’m absolutely sure I’d know if you were dead. I’m going to see you again. And soon._

The message had made Bellamy smile, just knowing that she, too, felt that strong connection.

So when Monty came to find him, jabbering about a transmission they’d received and insisting Bellamy accompany him to the comms room, he’d assumed at first that Clarke had sent a second message. A rare but not wholly unprecedented occurrence.

“Not Clarke,” Monty was shaking his head. “And before you ask, it’s not the bunker, either.”

 _Damn!_ They still hadn’t heard from the bunker. From Octavia. But that was a worry for another day.

If this wasn’t Clarke, and it wasn’t their friends in the bunker…then who the hell was out there?

It was a conversation, he realized at once, between speakers in two separate locations, and it was in English.

“Where’s it coming from?” he asked Monty.

“Not the ground.” Monty’s answer was terse.

 _Not the ground?_ If not the ground, then…

“Just listen,” Monty insisted.

_So what the hell is that big fucking ring? Is it some kind of space station? It’s not on the charts._

Bellamy was startled. “They can see us?”

Monty answered with a nod. “They’ve been trying to figure out what this is.”

_…maybe some other damned Eligius project? Maybe we should take a look._

_Eligius?_ Oh, fuck!

“Go get Raven.” Bellamy tried to keep the panic he was beginning to feel from leaching into his voice. “Tell her to stop whatever she’s doing. If she’s running something, have her shut it down. Tell everyone to meet us here. Oh, and Monty?”

Monty turned his head as he reached the doorway. “Yeah?”

“Do it quietly.”

Predictably, Raven’s first words when she arrived were, “What the fuck is so important?”

“Do you remember telling me about a mining colony? That the Eligius mining company sent a bunch of convicts to an asteroid belt and that’s why Becca invented nightblood in the first place?”

Raven nodded her head slowly. “Yeah, what about it?”

“Seems like the miners aren’t out on that asteroid anymore. Seems like they’re buzzing around right outside our door, traveling in at least two ships.”

 _“What!_ But that’s…impossible!”

“Apparently it’s not. I couldn’t see them at first, but just before they took off, I’m pretty sure I spotted them, two ships on our two o’clock. Look, can you redeploy the external cameras so we can get more complete coverage? Maybe a clearer view?”

Raven nodded wordlessly.

“Good. I want to know if they come back, and more than anything, I want to know what these fuckers want. So far, they think this ring is abandoned, and I’d just as soon keep it that way. If they figure out it’s habitable, they may just decide to take up residence here. And we have no way of defending ourselves. There’s only seven of us against…who knows how many of them.”

By now, the rest had joined them in the comms room and he brought them up to date.

“Is there any way they’d be able to tell we’re here if they came back and moved in a little closer?” He threw the question out there, unsure who might be able to answer it.

“I’m guessing it…would depend,” Murphy hazarded. “On whether they can get close enough to see our lights or hear the noise from our generators.”

Raven nodded slowly. “I suppose it’s possible, even if the light is only a reflection or the noise a vibration. We should maybe…be careful.”

“Yeah,” Bellamy agreed. “Better safe than sorry. So,” he added with a sigh, “if they do wander back into our neighborhood, I think we need to stop working on the pod for as long as they’re around.”

“What?!” Raven’s objection was immediate, which was not exactly a surprise to Bellamy.

“Hey, I’m the last person who wants to delay our getting out of here, but we need to keep our heads down. We’ll have to figure out an alert system. Something that will let us keep working, but we can still… stop on a dime. And I think,” he added reluctantly, “that while those ships are around we need to strip down to the basics. Life support and nothing else. No lights, no power, and most of all, no noise.”

“That’s definitely going to slow things down,” Monty said, “but… I think Bellamy’s right.”

Bellamy shrugged when he saw their resigned faces. “Who knows? Maybe they’ll never come back at all.”

But they did come back, again and again, each time interrupting the progress on the escape pod, often for days. They appeared to be driven by a relentless determination that those living on the ring tried to comprehend by piecing together the bits and pieces of conversation they overheard while hunkered down in the comms room, afraid to breathe.

It was always the same two voices, one male, one female. Perhaps, they decided, the commanders of the two ships. Most of their conversations were terse, cryptic, but after several months, they finally heard a very revealing exchange.

Male: _I still think we should investigate that metal ring. You keep saying it isn’t habitable, but how do you know? We can’t keep staying at the moon base forever. That was never supposed to be more than temporary._

Female: _Why do we keep having this same conversation over and over? Do you know how to land on something that isn’t a planet or an asteroid? Do any of us? What if we wreck one of our ships trying to get on that thing, only to find it’s got nothing to offer us?_

Male: _If we don’t get to Earth pretty soon, Dani, none of us are going to be alive anyway. We already took a huge risk going back into hypersleep, considering that that’s maybe what killed a lot of our parents in the first place._

Dani: _Maybe, but you know as well as I do, Marko, that Earth is still the only place we’re ever going to find the answers. I just…I didn’t expect the planet to be an irradiated wasteland. But it doesn’t change a thing. We have to find the lab. I know it was underground, so it’s probably still viable, even if the planet isn’t. Maybe then I can try to figure out why we seem to keep dying off._

Marko: _And how are we gonna find this mythical lab? The crazies from Eligius and their mad scientist have been dead for at least half a century._

Dani: I _have some old journals and notes with clues to the location. We will find it. The radiation on the planet has dropped since we got here four months ago. If it keeps dropping, we’ll eventually be able to land, and then we can start looking._

Marko: _Are you really that optimistic, or do you just enjoy disagreeing with me?_

The seven of them sitting motionless in the comms room very clearly heard her sigh.

Dani: _Both. And I’m not sure why we’re continuing this debate aboard ship, but it doesn’t matter. I’m still the one who gets to make the decision. For now, we’ll remain at our base on the moon and keep monitoring Earth for signs of life. The planet is still our objective. If I thought the ring had something to offer us, I might consider it, but as far_ as _I can see, it’s just a useless hunk of metal._

After hearing that conversation, there was some disagreement among the seven as to whether the extreme precautions they’d undertaken to stay hidden were absolutely necessary. They’d finally finished retrofitting the pod, and they discussed the miners’ predicament as they worked together to make some internal modifications to the ring that would allow them to move the pod to the hangar, where they could attach the heat shield.

“They’re just looking for Becca’s lab.” Harper offered her opinion. “We know where it is. We could help them.”

Echo had a different perspective. “They are a different clan, Harper, and they may be hostile toward us. See us as a threat. Or try to take our food or water or weapons. Maybe even our escape pod. We don’t know.”

“Echo’s right,” Monty added, and it was clear that he and Harper had already had this discussion. “We know almost nothing about them. I know you feel sorry for them, Harper, but have you forgotten Mount Weather? They seemed like nice people, too. Until they started draining your blood.”

Bellamy was torn, understanding Harper’s reluctance to see an enemy in every stranger. But his experiences on the ground had taught him to be cautious and wary. He decided to defer forming an opinion until he had more information. But then the Eligius ships suddenly disappeared as abruptly as they’d arrived, and when they hadn’t returned for several weeks, Bellamy began to wonder if they might have left for good.

But then, on the morning they were scheduled to finally begin the arduous task of moving the pod to the hangar, the ring received two separate transmissions.

The first came early and broke Bellamy’s heart. The second arrived a little later, and curdled his blood.

_I miss you, Bellamy. I miss all of you. I have to believe there’s a good reason you’re not answering me. But that you’re all still okay. That you’ll be here in…less than a month. I’m trying not to get too excited, but it’s damn hard._

All of Clarke’s messages had been upbeat of late. Positive. Expectant. He could hear the smile in her voice. Bellamy’s gut twisted, knowing they were doomed to disappoint her. They’d never be finished in anything like a month. With all that was still left to do, they’d be lucky if they were ready in three or four.

They’d barely begun to ready the pod for transport when they heard the frantic call from Emori, who’d been manning the comms and scanning the cameras. For the first time in months, the miners were back. In less than two minutes, every system save life support had been shut down and they were huddled on the floor of the comms room, filled with anxiety about the sudden reappearance of the Eligius ships. Wondering if there was a reason they’d come back.

They didn’t have to wonder for long.

The speakers were the same as before, and it was clear that the conversation had been been in progress for some time before the ships reached the ring. And that it was not in any way friendly.

Marko: _…you didn’t need to kill them all! We could have left them with some supplies. They could have had a little more time._

Dani: _Why would I leave precious supplies with people who were going to die anyway? Even with the hypersleep, I still needed to make sure we had enough food to last until we got to Earth. And I’m damn glad I did. And that was thirty years ago, anyway. Why are you complaining about it now?_

Marko: _Hard to have much of a conversation in hypersleep, Dani. Besides, I didn’t know about it until a few minutes ago when someone finally had the guts to tell me what you’d done_.

Dani: _You’re being idiotic, Marko. Would you rather I had left them to starve to death? Killing them all was more…humane._

Marko: _Humane? For god’s sake, Dani, you shot your own father._

Dani: _There wasn’t room on the ships for everyone. You know that! And he was too old and too weak. He would have been a drain on our resources. He probably would have died in hypersleep anyway, and then we would have had to deal with getting rid of his body._

Marko: _Is that what you tell yourself so you can sleep at night? That it was necessary?_

Dani: _I don’t have to justify myself to you. Which of my staff told you about this, anyway?_

Marko: _You’re crazy if you think I’m telling you that!_

Dani: _No need. I’ll be doing my own investigation, after which…_

And then they were blessedly out of range.

After that, there were no more discussions about helping the miners. Or complaints about laying low.

XXXXXXXXXX

_2100 days. Where are you, Bellamy? Have I been talking into a void all this time? I haven’t heard from the bunker, either. I think maybe Madi and I should take a trip into Polis, see what we can find out. Maybe they need our help. I’ll…let you know what I find out. Just in case you’re listening after all._

Despite the fire, and the miners, and a raft of minor delays, they finally finished the escape pod some five and half years after praimfaya. Raven tested and retested every system for both safety and reliability, and pronounced the pod sound. The radiation had finally dissipated enough that it was safe for them to descend. Monty had accumulated more than enough fuel to make the trip.

And yet, three months later, they were still on the ring.

Bellamy had given up asking Raven to build a communication device. They all understood that with the coming of the Eligius ships it wouldn’t be safe to transmit from the ring. The miners had returned on the day they’d begun to move the pod and had invaded their section of space on a regular basis ever since.

And that was the problem.

Their once-hated remnant of the Ark had begun to feel more and more like a safe cocoon.

From the conversations overheard over the past few months, it was clear that things were becoming critical for the miners. They seemed to be running out of food and were more desperate than ever to find a safe place to land on Earth. But they had not yet discovered Clarke’s green spot.

Bellamy had wanted to leave the very second the pod was finished and the fuel stored. But even he had to acknowledge that the process of egress from the Ark was bound to leave them extremely vulnerable to discovery. Raven estimated that it would take two days to get the pod from the hangar to the launch deck, get it ready for descent, and actually blast off. If the Eligius ships caught them out while they were in the middle of preparations, but not yet ready to leave, it could be disastrous.

They’d had endless discussions about it, but the majority always voted to remain on the Ark ‘for now’.

So they sat, and they waited, and every day they looked for a way around the impasse.

It was Monty who finally discovered it. A pattern. When they’d first arrived, the mining ships had turned up willy-nilly, following no discernible plan, but Monty’s eye for order had discovered that their recent visits weren’t quite so random.

He waited a full three months to tell the others, checking and rechecking his theory just to be sure.

“I decided to keep track of when they came this way, and for a long time it really did seem random. But that’s because I wasn’t looking for the right pattern. I don’t know, maybe it has something to do with their having a base on the moon, but I discovered that there is a pattern after all, a 28-day pattern. And there are three days in a row in the middle of each 28-day period when the miners don’t come this way at all. That’s when we need to leave.”

There was a short silence, and then Bellamy felt the elation course through him. And the relief.

“Son of a bitch,” Raven said, awestruck. “Nice work, Monty. When’s the next window?”

“Ten days.”

“Then let’s get cracking,”

When Raven took a fall a few days later, Bellamy wondered if having Murphy on board somehow made them more vulnerable to “Murphy’s Law.” Or maybe they were just fucking unlucky. Raven received no serious injuries, but the fall slowed down her preparations a bit. Nevertheless, none of them wanted to consider waiting another month to leave.

While six years on the ring had been a terrible but bearable burden, somehow waiting even one more month felt like it would be utter agony.

So their preparations fell a day behind, but then they only really needed two days to launch, and they’d be clear of the miner ships for three. It was enough. They’d make it work.

Later, Bellamy would wonder if Monty’s calculations were off, or if maybe the moon’s cycle had shifted. But whatever the cause, they were on the launch deck, and had just finished the adjustments to the pod, ready to begin all the painstaking systems checks, when, with a terrifying suddenness, the Eligius ships slipped back into their neighborhood.

One fucking day early.

Bellamy didn’t even need the comms or the cameras, because they could see the ships clearly through the windows on the launch deck.

And this time, they weren’t going to be able to hide.

The ring was lit up not only on the inside, but with exterior lights as well. For a brief split-second, the ships seemed to veer away and Bellamy thought maybe they hadn’t been spotted after all. But when they came roaring back, closer than they’d ever come before, he knew it was hopeless.

He raced back to the comms room, desperate to know what the miners were saying. But it was all as predictable as fuck.

Marko: _Do you see that, Dani? That thing you called a useless piece of scrap metal has people on it after all._

Dani: _Who are they, Marko? Do you think they’ve been here all this time?_

Marko: _I don’t know and I don’t care. We’re out of options and suddenly this thing pops up right in front of us like a fucking miracle. I’m gonna move in closer, look for a place to land. Have everyone get their weapons locked. We don’t know what we’ll be up against._

Shit, shit, shit! They were about to be boarded by armed invaders and he had no way to stop it. Should they grab what weapons they had and try to hold them off in one room? But that would mean abandoning the pod, their one chance of getting off this place.

In the few seconds Bellamy grappled desperately with two equally unthinkable options, another transmission began. One that was a bit later today than usual.

_Bellamy, if you can hear me, if you’re still alive, it’s been 2199 days since praimfaya. I don’t know why I still do this every day. Maybe it’s my way of staying sane. Not forgetting who I am. Who I was. It’s been safe for you to come down for over a year now. Why haven’t you? The bunker’s gone silent, too. We tried to dig them out for a while but there’s too much rubble. I haven’t made contact with them either. Anyway, I still have hope. Tell Raven to aim for the one spot of green and you’ll find me. The rest of the planet, from what I’ve seen, basically sucks._

As soon as Clarke had begun transmitting, the Eligius ships had slowed their approach to the ring, and their commanders had begun a new conversation.

Marko: _Fuck, did you hear that, Dani? I think that transmission was coming from the planet._

Dani: _It was. I’ve already triangulated the source and gotten the coordinates._

Marko: _How the hell have we never heard her before?_

Dani: _There’s a satellite on the metal ring. I can see it clearly from this angle. We’ve just never been this close to it before._

Marko: _So what about this hunk of metal? We still landing here?_

Dani: _No. New priority. We needed a safe place on the planet, and now we’ve found it. I’m sending you the coordinates, and I want you down there NOW. I’ll go back to base and pick up the rest of our people._

Bellamy listened in stunned silence as the two transmissions played out simultaneously. His initial relief that they weren’t going to be boarded after all soon gave way to a dawning horror that they’d placed Clarke right in the miners’ crosshairs.

 _Run, Clarke,_ he screamed silently. _Don’t be there when they land._

And then he heard Clarke’s sign-off, her voice filled with excited anticipation.

 _Never mind,_ she said exultantly. _I see you._

It had all happened so fast. No more than a few minutes could have passed from the time they first spotted the ships to the time Clarke ended her transmission. Thinking it was them. Sure they’d made it down at last. The terrible irony was that if their launch prep had gone just a little more smoothly, she would have been right.

“Clarke’s saved us again,” Raven said, her voice tight with dismay.

“Yeah,” Bellamy agreed. “And now we have to save her.”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After six years, they'd finally made it back to Earth, but Clarke was nowhere to be found. The last they'd heard, the Eligius ships had been headed straight for Clarke's coordinates, and now Bellamy was worried sick.

He’d forgotten about the silence.

Six more years on the Ark, with its constant background hum from all those machines that worked so hard keeping them alive, and Bellamy had forgotten how deathly quiet the ground could seem.

His first time on the planet, when he’d stowed away on the drop ship, scared out of his mind that he’d be caught and floated before he could ever see Octavia again, he’d been so relieved to actually land - and so consumed with protecting himself and his sister - that he’d paid little attention to the environment. Beyond noting, of course, that since it hadn’t killed them all immediately, it wasn’t likely to do so.

But he knew Earth now, from the beauty of her sunsets to the devastating cataclysms, and he’d been longing to return for all these years. Now here he was at last, and it was all at once achingly familiar and terrifyingly strange.

And then he heard them. The chirp of a cicada, the buzz of a honeybee. The flutter of a butterfly’s wings. The insects had come back, he realized, and maybe the planet truly was healing itself.

Bellamy wanted to smile. He’d always been certain that his return to Earth would be filled with unalloyed joy, but as he listened to the quiet sounds of the planet coming to life all around him, he could focus on nothing but one burning question.

_Where the hell was Clarke?_

After the Eligius ships had shifted away from the ring, instead chasing down to the planet in search of Clarke, it had taken them more than eight hours to complete the systems checks on the escape pod. Bellamy knew that Raven was nearly as worried about Clarke as he was, but she still refused to take any shortcuts. And after what had happened, after the fire, he supposed he could hardly blame her.

But he’d still been champing at the bit the whole time.

And then came the question of where they should land. Bellamy had wanted to head straight for Clarke, for those coordinates they’d calculated months and months ago. Numbers that had been burned into his brain because they led to the place that shouted _Clarke is here._

But the others had pointed out that it would be a strategic error to just drop down right on top of the mining ships. They were certain that the miners wouldn’t hurt Clarke because they needed her. She knew everything about the ground and they knew nothing, including the location of Becca’s lab. And she was clever enough to figure all that out and take advantage of it. While he still chafed at every further delay, Bellamy could see the logic of this argument.

So Raven set a course that would set them down within a few miles of Clarke’s position. The plan was to make their way to her quietly, stealthily. To assess the situation and provide assistance if necessary.

As they moved from their landing point toward Clarke’s coordinates, it was hard to miss the enormous profile of one of the Eligius ships rising in the distance. Viewed through a scope, it appeared to be silent and unoccupied, but as they made their way toward Clarke’s last known position they still gave it a wide berth. It seemed unlikely that the miners would have left their vessel completely unguarded, even on what they viewed as a mostly uninhabited planet.

A three-hour walk brought them to the exact spot from which Clarke had regularly transmitted, but all they found of her was a makeshift tent and a few household items. Her transmitting equipment was there, too, the small satellite she used to enhance her broadcasts. But there was no sign of the rover, or anything to indicate what had happened there.

Bellamy nearly wept in frustration when he discovered her sketchbook, its pages filled with pictures of the space travelers and the bunker dwellers, all drawn from memory, all rendered in remarkable detail. But his mouth gaped open in shock when he discovered dozens of sketches of himself. Page after page he turned, only to find his face and body depicted from every possible angle. Bellamy sank heavily to the ground, clutching the book to his chest.

Echo approached quietly and peered over his shoulder. She sighed, squeezing his arm lightly.

“I will find her for you, Bellamy.”

“How?” He turned, his face a mask of questions.

“I have not forgotten my tracking skills,” she said, her confidence growing now that she was back on the ground. “I have already seen signs of several people, all moving off in that direction.” Echo cocked her head toward the north.

Bellamy nodded just as Emori approached.

“I think I know this place,” she told them with barely-suppressed excitement.

“How can you…?” Bellamy was bewildered.

“The radiation killed all the living things, but the mountains are still the same. And the rivers. I’ve already checked out the one that’s close by. It’s familiar.”

Bellamy frowned and cocked his head, and as soon as he paid attention he heard it, too. The sound of running water.

The two grounder women glanced at each other, Emori giving Echo a small nod.

Echo cleared her throat. “You have been good to us, Bellamy, and we will find Clarke for you.”

Bellamy wasn’t sure why, but he absolutely believed them.

XXXXXXXXXX

Echo was able to follow the tracks she had found at Clarke’s campsite to a clearing a couple of miles away, where they made a further discovery.

“Aren’t those tire tracks?” Monty asked, stopping abruptly and peering down at a patch of dirt.

“Yes,” Echo confirmed after a quick look. “I have seen such tracks before. They are from a Skaikru rover. But the tire tracks are more recent than the tracks made by the walkers.”

“So… _what?_ Clarke is in the rover tracking the same group of people we are?” Raven speculated. “Or she’s being forced to drive some of them to wherever the hell the rest of them have gone?”

“Or,” Harper added, still wanting to give the miners the benefit of the doubt, “they’re all going to the same place - Becca’s lab, maybe - and Clarke is following behind in the rover.”

“Harper…” Bellamy sighed. He hated to burst her bubble, but he knew that scenario was most unlikely.

“Echo,” he asked, wanting to be absolutely sure he understood, “when you say more recent, do you just mean that the Rover followed the others, or that some time had passed between the two sets of tracks?”

“Some time had passed. Definitely.”

Bellamy nodded. There was only one explanation that fit.

“I think it’s clear that Clarke is tracking the others and that she’s doing it in the rover. The miners have no idea where anything is located, so they wouldn’t be directing her to anywhere at all. And if they were going together…well…even discounting the time difference, Clarke would be leading, not following, because she’s the one who knows the lay of the land.”

“Couldn’t one of the miners be driving the rover? They might have had motorized vehicles on that asteroid, and be familiar with driving.” This from Murphy.

“They probably did,” Bellamy agreed. “But then why send a group of walkers ahead, when none of them knows where they’re going? Why not take the vehicle immediately and lead the parade? That commander, Marko, sounded like he’d be more than willing to ride while his people walked behind.”

He shook his head. “Nothing really fits except Clarke tracking them. She’s smart. If she saw them landing, I think one of the first things she might do would be to hide the Rover. Something to hold in reserve in case she needed it. Which, it turns out, she did.”

Frown lines appeared between Harper’s brows as she tried to piece it together. “But…why bother? If the miners went off somewhere and she was free enough to get to the Rover, why would she bother to track them?”

Unfortunately, Bellamy was pretty sure he’d figured that out. When he heard “Oh, fuck!” from Raven, he knew she must have caught on, too.

“They took Madi,” he said quietly, “For whatever reason, they took Clarke’s…daughter, and you know damn well she’s going to move heaven and Earth to get her back.”

He saw the nods as even Harper recognized this as far and away the most likely explanation.

“So…what do we do now?” Monty asked quietly.

Before Bellamy could answer, Emori spoke quickly. “Would it be helpful to know where Clarke had the rover hidden?”

“It might,” Bellamy nodded. “What did you have in mind?”

“Remember how I said I knew this place? I don’t think the big landmarks will have changed. Like the river. That’s still there. And I’m pretty sure there’s a large cave about a mile in that direction.”

Emori pointed west toward where a small mountain - hardly more than a large hill - rose toward the sky. “If the tire marks track in that direction, then I think that’s the most likely place it would have been hidden.”

Bellamy was torn. On the one hand, he didn’t want to waste a single second finding Clarke, and then helping her rescue Madi. But he knew that was his emotion driving him, that it would make much more sense to backtrack to Emori’s cave. See if Clarke had used it, if there was anything useful there. Anything that might help them find her.

If nothing else, it would give them a place to spend the night, and with the rapidly deepening twilight, that had to be a prime consideration.

“Okay,” he said finally. “Let’s see what we can find.”

Within a very short time, they had traversed the stretch of ground that sloped gently upward toward the hill. Emori’s memory had not been faulty, and she led them directly to the entrance to a large cave.

When Bellamy stepped inside, his eyes widened in surprise. The place was so enormous that it could more properly be called a cavern, and it immediately became clear to him that this was another place that Clarke had used as a base. It was possible, he thought, that she had several such camps scattered in every direction. It’s certainly what he would have done himself.

After all, it wasn’t like she’d had a lot of competition for the real estate.

He heard a sudden shout from Murphy, who’d moved into the recesses of the cave.

“Holy shit, Bellamy! Get your ass back here!”

What the hell had Murphy found, he wondered, as he quickly made his way into the cave’s interior. Food? Weapons?

All of the above, it turned out, but that wasn’t what had provoked Murphy’s shout. For sitting in front of him, slightly the worse for wear, was the exact truck that he and Clarke had used to transport fuel to Becca’s lab all those years ago. Fuel that had, as it turned out, powered the rocket that had taken them all into space and saved his life.

_Son of a bitch!_

Murphy was shaking his head in shock and admiration.

“Not that I ever did, but remind me never to sell Clarke Griffin short. She was all alone except for a kid, and look at what the hell she got done.”

Bellamy looked past the miracle that was the truck to find an enormous store of food, all neatly stacked and labeled, as well as several weapons that Clarke had somehow managed to save from the ravages of praimfaya.

“That is a hell of a lot of food,” Monty commented as the others finally reached them. “For just two people, I mean.”

Raven shrugged. “Clarke always plans for the worst. It’s probably her _just in case_ stash.”

“Still…” Harper shook her head in wonder at the sheer abundance of the provisions.

“It was for us,” Bellamy said quietly, without a second thought. “She knew we wouldn’t be able to bring much with us when we came back, so she’s been squirreling away food for us.”

Bellamy was staggered by the magnitude of what Clarke had been able to accomplish, remembering anew how truly extraordinary she was. His need to see her, to touch her, to express his admiration in person, was suddenly so strong, so immediate, that it was like a living thing, clawing at him from the inside.

He sighed, ruthlessly tamping down his emotions. All in good time, he told himself. Right now, they needed to eat, rest, and plan. Tomorrow would be soon enough.

XXXXXXXXXX

Finding the truck had been providential, especially for Raven. He admired her determination in keeping up with them the day before, but he knew all that walking had to have caused her a great deal of pain. Even today, after several hours of sleep, he could tell just by the stiffness of her gait that another day of traipsing around the countryside would have been been out of the question.

So the truck had been a godsend.

They piled in some of the provisions that Clarke had been so carefully stockpiling, along with all the weapons they’d found, and drove out of the mammoth cave at first light.

While the truck made travel less arduous, it was still necessarily slow. There was only so much tracking that Echo could do, only so much she could observe, from inside the truck.

Fortunately, the weather had been cooperative. It had been dry the previous day and remained so, leaving the trail open and clear. Their quarry had also been cooperative, both those on foot and Clarke in the rover. Bellamy doubted that either of them ever remotely considered that they might be followed.

But even with the truck, and the easy tracking, the going was slow for most of the morning. The sun had risen high in the sky, and Bellamy was beginning to consider making a short stop for food and rest, when he rounded a sharp curve in the road and…there it was. No need to bother with the slow, painstaking process of tracking any longer when everyone’s intended destination was clear.

Directly in front of them, several miles distant but still highly visible, was the second Eligius ship. The one commanded by Dani, who they’d already learned was the ranking officer.

While some details remained a mystery, the broad outline of what must have happened was becoming clearer to Bellamy. When the first Eligius ship landed, Clarke hid the rover before making contact with them. But then something went wrong, the contact became hostile, and she and Madi were somehow separated.

It was obvious to him why they took the girl. She was leverage. The miners must have wanted something from Clarke, and for whatever reason she’d refused. Or at least…hesitated. So they’d grabbed the girl - maybe on the orders of the cold-blooded Dani - and were probably bringing her to the commander for further instructions.

But Clarke was hot on their trail, in a vehicle they probably had no idea she possessed.

Bellamy’s anxiety began to ratchet up as he contemplated how desperate Clarke must be. He remembered all the reckless things he’d done in the name of keeping Octavia safe.

Fueled by apprehension, Bellamy drove toward the Eligius ship at near breakneck speed, pushing the truck to its limits as they bumped along the uneven terrain. A sudden shout from Echo startled him, and he slammed on the breaks, tossing them all about as the truck ground to a sudden halt.

“What is it?” he said, peering anxiously out the windshield for signs of hostile forces.

“Back there, in the trees,” she said, pointing to a small copse of young maples, just beginning to reach some heavy growth. “I think it is Clarke’s rover.”

Bellamy hopped out, Murphy leaping off the back of the truck to accompany him.

“Why would she leave it here and go the rest of the way on foot?” Murphy asked, frowning, when they found the rover concealed among the trees. “It’s at least another mile to that ship.”

Bellamy gazed out across the expanse of grassy fields that lay between them and the miners’ ship.

“Because she wanted to approach stealthily, not go in guns blazing. And this is the last good hiding place. We almost didn’t spot it ourselves and we knew she was driving it. She doesn’t want them to know about the rover.”

Murphy’s lips twisted in a wry smile. “Clarke always did play her cards close to the vest.”

“And I think we should follow her example.”

The copse was unusually thick for such a sparsely-treed meadow, and Bellamy found a way to park the truck in among the maples for maximum concealment.

“We’ll wait here until nightfall,” he told the others. “Even if there are no guards posted, there’s no way we won’t be spotted in broad daylight.”

“But, Bellamy,” he could hear the dismay in Harper’s voice, “Clarke may already be in trouble.”

“You think I don’t know that!” he bit out, his own anxiety leaking through. “But if we’re picked off before we ever get near the ship we aren’t going to be much help, are we?”

Harper subsided then, to Bellamy’s relief. There was already a war going on inside him, waged between his instinct to leap recklessly into the fray because Clarke might be in danger, and his hard-won experience which told him that would be exactly the wrong approach. They needed the cover of night and he would force himself to wait.

He knew he should try to to rest, but Bellamy was too keyed up to sleep. Every time he closed his eyes, he saw Clarke’s face. For a while up there on the Ark, it seemed like he’d almost forgotten what she looked like. But two days on the ground had brought her face back to him in sharp relief.

When he finally began to pace around the perimeter of the truck, Raven limped over to him, grabbing his arm to halt his aimless movement and pulling him down to the ground. They scooted back, leaning against the trunk of one of the more mature maples.

“You’re the one who insisted we wait, Bellamy,” she reminded him quietly. “But if you don’t manage to settle down and get your head straight, you’re not gonna be fit to lead a team of 11-year-olds in a game of red rover, never mind an armed attack against an unknown force.”

Bellamy sighed, briefly closing his eyes. “She’s so close, Raven. I can feel her. And she’s in trouble.” He paused, exhaling slowly. “And what if, after all this time, I can’t help her?” His voice was raspy as he reluctantly ground out his fears.

“You will,” she said, squeezing his arm, a gesture of comfort, affection, and support. “All this, all we’ve been through, that can’t have been for nothing. And besides,” she added, grinning, “I wanna meet that kid of hers.”

Bellamy smiled. “Yeah, I can’t wait for that, either. Clarke as a mom is something I really want to see.”

“And you will,” she said, her voice brimming with the confidence that Raven somehow always managed to project. “In fact, I’m pretty sure I’m gonna have to pry the two of you apart with a wedge once Clarke knows you’re here.”

“I hope so,” he said, yawning, his eyes suddenly drooping. He settled more comfortably against the tree.

XXXXXXXXXX

What seemed like only seconds later, Raven was shaking him awake, but it was nearly dark, and she assured him he’d slept for almost two hours.

They all hurriedly grabbed some food and water, wolfing it down quickly in the fading light. By necessity, Raven would stay behind. Even in the dark, they’d need to cross the open ground quickly in order to remain undetected, and it was understood by everyone, most of all by Raven, that she would just slow them down. But she would be in constant radio contact, ready to barrel across the field in the truck at a moment’s notice.

Bellamy knew it was a sketchy plan, but under the circumstances, it was the best he could come up with.

Weapons strapped on their backs, the six moved across the grassy field at a rapid pace, and within minutes they were within a few yards of the Eligius ship. His practiced eye roamed over the ship, but Bellamy couldn’t spot any sign of guards. He thought maybe the miners weren’t used to having to guard their territory. Either that or they simply had no idea there was anyone else alive on this nearly dead planet.

When they were about ten yards out, Bellamy held up a hand to halt the others, while he himself continued to move forward, stealthily circling the perimeter, searching for a way in.

Where the hell was the fucking door? If he couldn’t even find the damn door, there was little chance they’d be able to break in.

He’d nearly completed the circuit, his frustration rising as he prepared to start a second lap, when a panel slid open nearly on top of him, and a slight figure came running out.

_Shit! That HAD to be Madi. Should he…?_

Before he could finish the thought, a much larger figure came barreling out after her, and she was snatched up by her pursuer before she’d made it a hundred yards. The girl fought valiantly, but she was no match for the strongly-built guard.

If the man hadn’t stopped to berate her, if he hadn’t felt the need to tell her what a _pain the the ass_ she was and how he _couldn’t_ _wait to get rid of her_ , but had instead carried her immediately back to the ship, there probably wouldn’t have been time. But as she struggled in his arms, he chose to give vent to his frustrations, leaving the ship’s door open for several unguarded seconds.

It was long enough.

Bellamy signaled the others, and while the guard was distracted by Madi’s exertions, they quietly crossed the remaining few feet to the ship, slipping inside and flattening themselves against the walls of the interior hallway. The illumination was so low that it was scarcely any brighter inside the ship than it had been in the night they’d left behind.

For a quick second, Bellamy considered simply running back out again and grabbing the girl, but he realized almost immediately that was a bad idea.

First of all, he really didn’t want to have to kill the guard. Bellamy didn’t know what the hell was going on, but surely killing one of these people was almost certain to start a war, and the last thing he wanted was to fight another war, much less provoke one himself.

On the other hand, if he didn’t kill the guard, and do it pretty quickly at that, the man would surely have enough time to raise an alarm. Even if they managed to free Madi, they’d have been detected, the element of surprise lost, and they wouldn’t have accomplished their other goal.

Because there was no way in hell he was leaving that ship without Clarke.

Bellamy held his breath when the guard stepped back inside, Madi flung over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes as he slid the panel shut. But the man swung down the opposite hallway, never noticing that his ship had been breached by six armed invaders. As the guard turned away, the girl shifted on his shoulder and Bellamy found himself staring into a pair of frightened brown eyes.

Madi’s eyes widened, her mouth forming an “O,” and for one horrifying moment he thought she might be going to give them away. Alarmed, he quickly touched his index finger to his lips in the universal sign for _be quiet_. And then for reasons he didn’t understand, the girl’s face suddenly cleared and she smiled at him, giving him a small nod.

As soon as Madi’s guard was out of sight, he let out a slow breath and cocked his head to let the others know they’d be moving in the opposite direction.

Bellamy understood this was the weakest part of his plan. They had no idea where the hell they were going, nor any notion of what kind of force they might be facing. The one potential bright spot, he’d thought, was that this had been a mining ship, not a military ship. There was nothing to be gained by keeping the layout a secret, so perhaps...

“Bellamy!”

He heard Monty’s soft hiss and hurried down the hallway.

“I struck gold,” Monty told him excitedly. “This is some kind of lounge area and there’s actually a map of the ship on the wall.”

“No shit!” Bellamy couldn’t believe their luck.

“Nope. I guess they thought it would make life easier for the miners if they could learn their way around the ship.”

“Gonna make it easier for us, too,” Bellamy said with a grin. “Thank you, Eligius Mining Company.”

“So what do you think? Corporate offices? Observation deck? Uh…sleep room?”

“Is there no throne room?” Echo wanted to know. “Where is their king, or…or chancellor?”

Bellamy shook his head. “It’s a business, Echo, not a government, although they do have to maintain control over everyone… Wait!” He turned again to the schematic, “Do you see a small room anywhere, anything that could be the…here it is!”

Bellamy’s finger stabbed at the outline of a small room on the top floor. They had to turn their heads to read its name, because the room was so small that its use was printed sideways.

Murphy squinted as he twisted his head. “Lock-up,” he read.

Bellamy nodded. “If they hadn’t put her in there before, they probably will now after she almost got away.”

“What about Clarke?” Murphy asked. “Or do you think she might be in the lock-up, too?”

Bellamy shrugged. “There’s no way to know where she is. But Clarke will never leave without Madi, even temporarily, so we start by getting Madi out. Without getting caught.”

They found the stairs a little further along the corridor and started the climb to the sixth floor. The ship seemed curiously…deserted, and Bellamy began to wonder just how many of these miners were actually still alive. Dani and Marko had discussed some health plague that sounded like it was killing them off, which was why they were looking for Becca’s lab…

His musings were interrupted by a high-pitched shriek just as they reached the fifth floor. Bellamy slammed open the door from the stairwell into the corridor to find a young woman struggling unsuccessfully to escape the grip of a heavy-set guard.

_A young blonde woman._

The air whooshed from Bellamy’s lungs, and for a split second, his body refused to move.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going, girlie?” The guard’s tone was menacing, and Bellamy was suddenly leaping into action. Acting on pure instinct, he quickly twisted his rifle, swinging it by the barrel and clubbing the man on the back of the head.

The big man fell heavily, going down without a murmur.

Freed from the guard, the woman began to run down the hall, and after the briefest of hesitations, Bellamy gave chase, calling after her as loudly as he dared.

“Wait! Clarke!”

She stopped in her tracks at the sound of his voice, turning with a gasp, wide-eyed and disbelieving.

Her hair was shorter, and her face slimmer, but she was still his Clarke. He stared at her, rooted to the spot, scarcely able to breathe. Then he lifted his arm, trying desperately to reach out for her, as his hand began to shake.

Her eyes never leaving his face, Clarke advanced slowly until she stood right in front of him. She moved her hand up to brush tentatively across his brow and down his cheek.

“Bellamy?” His name on her lips was hardly more than an exhale. “How…how can you be here?”

“Yeah, it’s me,” he said, his mouth turning up in the faintest of smiles. His answer was the simplest one possible. “I came looking for you.”

They stared at each other in wonder for a moment longer, and then she pulled him into her arms with a soft cry.

“Bellamy,” she whispered into his broad shoulder. “You’re really here.”

He could feel his heart pounding wildly as his arms closed around her. Bellamy breathed her in, giving himself leave to revel in the sight of her, in the feel of her. And wondered how much force might be required in that moment to pull him away from her.

“I’ve missed you,” she murmured, clutching him tightly around the waist.

“Yeah,” he said, barely able to speak around the lump in his throat. “Me, too.”

And then, as if she were waking from a trance, Clarke wrenched herself out of his arms, shaking her head, her expression desperate.

“I… we can’t do this now. I have to get…um, I can’t explain now but it’s really important.” She sounded frantic, and he could see her searching for a quick way to make him understand.

“No need to explain,” he assured her with a soft smile, his hands still grasping her arms. “I know all about Madi.”

“But…but…how can you?” Her bewilderment was plain.

“I heard you, Clarke. Every day. We all did. We just didn’t have any way to answer.”

Her jaw dropped as she gaped at him. “And…the others? Are they here, too?”

He nodded. “Five of them are here in the ship, and Raven is waiting back at the truck.”

“The truck? You found the truck?”

Bellamy chuckled at the expression on her face.

“Let’s get Madi out of here and then we can talk about everything.”

“Right. Okay.” Her head tilted and she appeared to be thinking hard, suddenly all business. “They had been keeping her on this floor, but then she ran off before I could get to her. But I heard a lot of noise so don’t think she made it.”

“She didn’t. But I have a good idea where she might be now. Does anyone except this guy,” he nodded down at the guard, “know you’re here?”

She shook her head.

“Good. So there are seven of us here, and they have no idea we’re coming. Let’s get this done.”

He and Clarke moved back into the stairwell, where the others were waiting. She was greeted with brief silent hugs from Harper and Monty, a smile from Murphy, and nods from the grounders.

“You all made it,” she said quietly, her smile real despite her anxiety for Madi.

“Thanks to you,” Harper said. “Come on. I’m dying to meet your kid.”

In the end, it proved easier than they might have imagined. With little reason to expect outside interference, the miners had locked Madi in their one-room jail, but hadn’t bothered to set a guard on the door.

“Madi, are you in there,” Clarke asked quietly, as soon as they found the room, which had been conveniently labeled _Lock-up_.

“Yes,” Madi hissed. “Is Bellamy with you?”

Clarke’s eyes widened in surprise. “Uh, yes, he is, but how…”

“I’ll explain later,” Bellamy said, shaking his head.

“Hey, could you guys get a move on?” Murphy complained from his post as lookout. “You can have all the weepy conversations you want after we get out of this place.”

Clarke barked out a laugh, clapping her hand over her mouth at the unexpected sound. “Glad to see Murphy is still Murphy.”

Monty pulled a small explosive device out of his pocket and attached it to the lock, set the detonator, and told Madi to back away from the door.

“I thought this might come in handy,” was his only remark.

One small, but relatively quiet, explosion later, and Madi was free, and clasped tightly in Clarke’s arms. They moved quickly toward the stairwell, and while they’d escaped detection so far, the sound of eight bodies clattering down the stairs had Bellamy thinking their luck might well be about to run out.

He grabbed for his walkie. “Raven, are you there?” he asked, his voice as quiet as possible.

Only seconds later the reply came. “Right here, chief. What’s up.”

“Party of eight needs immediate pickup.”

"Did you say…eight?”

“Raven, get the hell down here.”

“On my way.” He heard the engine turn over before she’d even shut off the comm.

The miners did finally come to life, but by then the rescue team was nearly to the door. A door which had no discernible knob or latch. Anxiety filled Bellamy anew, and he began to fear they were going to have to fight it out after all.

“Like this,” Madi said impatiently, rolling her eyes and entering the correct combination into a keypad before sliding the door open. “I watched one of the guards. How do you think I got out the first time?”

As they raced through doorway and onto the field, Bellamy asked Clarke, “Are you sure she’s not actually related to you?”

They were still laughing a few seconds later when Raven and the truck roared into view.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bellamy is thrilled that they've found Clarke, and relieved that she and Madi have been rescued, but will he ever find the courage to tell Clarke how he really feels about her? Now the two of them have embarked on yet another road trip, back to the very place where they were so abruptly torn apart. But this time, maybe he'll get his heart's desire.

As a mom, Clarke was either a revelation, or exactly what he would have expected, depending on how he looked at it.

She was patient, kind, and loving, but also direct. And she didn’t put up with any bullshit. So in many ways, she was the same Clarke he’d first met at the drop ship door, now seven years older and probably a whole lot wiser.

The revelation was in how open she’d become with her emotions.

From almost the moment he’d met her, it had been easy to see how much Clarke cared about people, how much of herself she was willing to sacrifice to keep them all safe. It was only when it came to caring deeply about some one person in particular that she sometimes seemed to…shy away.

Six years of perspective had him admitting the possibility that the problem might have been that he’d wanted that _someone in particular_ to be him. Because for as much as she’d cared about him, she’d always seemed a little…skittish whenever things had started to get more personal between them. More…intimate.

Except, he thought, there at the end. That last day. Before fate had torn them apart.

But now…now it seemed like her love for Madi had ripped open that part of her she’d always held so tightly together. Now the floodgates were open, and emotion poured out of her without reserve.

This new Clarke Griffin was loving and affectionate. Demonstrative, even. Not only with Madi, but with the rest of them. With everyone she’d thought she lost, but who had now been found.

Bellamy longed to be just as open with her, just as loving and affectionate. But he feared that if he ever allowed himself to unleash even half of what he felt for Clarke, he would overwhelm her with emotion. Instead of something to be cherished, his feelings for her would become a burden to bear. So every day he worked at holding himself tightly in check.

He’d noted Raven side-eyeing him frequently since the day they found Clarke, until the moment finally came, as he’d known it inevitably would, when she longer held her tongue.

“Aren’t you ever gonna tell her?” she hissed, her exasperation evident.

Bellamy frowned. He wasn’t having this conversation.

“I think we have more important things to think about, Raven.”

She huffed and subsided, but only, he was afraid, for the moment.

XXXXXXXXXX

Immediately after Madi’s rescue, they’d picked up the rover, stopping only to retrieve Clarke’s radio and makeshift tent before hightailing it back to the cavern that Clarke had turned into a storage depot. As a precaution, Echo and Emori had made an effort to cover the tire tracks, but Bellamy doubted there were any skilled trackers amongst a population that had been engaged in strip-mining on an asteroid before they put themselves into hypersleep for thirty years and set a course back to Earth.

Later, as the group reflected on the miners’ actions, Clarke was unsurprised to hear that they had health problems and were desperately hoping to find some answers at Becca’s lab.

“What made them so sure you knew about the lab in the first place?” Bellamy wondered aloud.

“I think it must have been the nightblood,” Clarke said with a shrug. “I’d cut my hand that same morning, the day they landed. The wound was fresh and the nightblood was obvious. They jumped to the conclusion that I had some connection to the lab.” She paused. “And they were right.”

“And that’s when they pulled the guns.”

She nodded. “They never said why they wanted to find Becca’s lab, but after they pointed their guns at me, I really didn’t care. That’s when Madi came running out. When the Eligius ship appeared, I’d told her to stay out of sight, but when she saw the guns she was scared for me, and,” she sighed, “she doesn’t always do what I tell her.”

Bellamy chuckled sympathetically. “Shades of Octavia.”

Clarke smiled wryly as she continued her story.

“Madi managed to toss me my rifle just before one of them grabbed her. After that, it was a standoff. I wondered if they were really prepared to shoot us, but I couldn’t take a chance with Madi’s safety. I was frantic, but before I could think what to do, they’d run off with her, shouting that I could have her back when I told them what they wanted to know.”

Bellamy nodded. “That certainly got your attention.”

“Yeah,” she agreed, her voice tight, her face set. “But not in a good way. I couldn’t fight them, but there was no way I was just letting them take her. I ran for the rover so I could track them at a safe distance. At least that way I’d know where Madi was.”

Bellamy had been mulling over her uncertainty about whether the miners would really have used their guns.

“I don’t know whether this crew would have shot you, Clarke, but I can tell you that the woman who commands the other ship killed a whole lot of people when they left that asteroid. Including her own father. And she didn’t sound all that torn up about it. I don’t think most of the others even know what she did.”

“Then that’s information we can hold over her head during negotiations.”

“Negotiations?”

“We have something they want, Bellamy. The location of Becca’s lab.” She blew out a quick breath and her eyes took on a faraway look. “I’m pretty sure the underground section is still intact, because I rode out praimfaya on the lowest level.”

Bellamy immediately had a dozen questions, which he managed to distill down to just one. “Are you ever going to tell us about…all of that?”

“I will,” she promised, reaching over to lightly squeeze his hand. “And I want to hear your story, too. All of yours,” she made clear, swiveling her head to include the rest. “But first we need to deal with these people.”

“Right,” Bellamy said. “Tell me what we’re negotiating for. We have something they want, but now that we have Madi back, what do they have that we want?”

Her answer was immediate. “A digging machine. While I was in that ship looking for Madi I found the diggers. And their trucks. I wondered why they hadn’t used any of them until I saw that all the solar panels were broken.”

“Digging machines. That means we could actually dig out the bunker.” Bellamy tried to tamp down his elation, almost afraid to get his hopes up.

“Exactly.”

“But…you did say…you said the solar panels are broken…”

“Yes, but we have something those miners don’t have,” she smiled.

“Yeah,” Raven spoke up from his other side. “Me.”

Bellamy grinned at her. “Hell, if you can build an escape pod, a couple of solar panels should be a piece of cake.”

He could hardly believe it. They’d found Clarke, and now there was a good chance they’d be able to clear away the rubble under which Octavia and the others were buried. Bellamy began to feel the first sparks of excitement.

“Okay, then. How do we set up your negotiation?”

They discussed a half dozen potential scenarios, but in the end they decided they had little to lose from the most direct approach. The following day, Bellamy and Clarke drove back to the ship and from a safe distance, shouted their demands for a meeting with Dani. The woman eventually appeared, looking somewhat shaken that they’d asked for her by name. When a man emerged with her, Bellamy assumed he was Marko.

The four of them met in middle of the field. Several armed miners took up a position near the ship, while Murphy and Echo, who’d accompanied them, stood guard near the rover. Bellamy couldn’t help but be reminded of Clarke’s first meeting with the ill-fated Anya all those years ago. He hoped this negotiation would produce more positive results.

His intention was to leave most of the negotiating to Clarke. She’d always had a talent for it, seeming to know exactly when to offer a carrot, and when to shake the stick. Even, occasionally, when to insert the knife.

“I think we can help each other,” was her opening remark.

Dani’s preemptive response was that they had superior numbers and declined to negotiate. Clarke shrugged, and she and Bellamy began an immediate retreat across the field but Marko called after them.

“Dani was mistaken,” he said. “We lost someone else today and we need to find out what’s wrong with us.”

As they turned back, Bellamy watched Clarke ruthlessly suppress what he knew would be her natural instinct to help.

“So what do you want from us in exchange for the location of the lab?” Marko asked.

“Marko!” Dani insisted, with barely-suppressed fury. “We can’t make a deal with these people! We can’t trust them.”

She faced Clarke with open hostility. “One day soon we will find where you’re hiding and then we’ll force you to tell us what we need to know. The information you continue keep from us even though our people are dying!”

Clarke’s mouth twisted into a wry smile. “Yeah, I’ve heard you’re a real humanitarian, Dani. Didn’t want the people you’d left behind to die of starvation, after you took all their food. So you shot them.” She paused. “Even your own father.”

When Bellamy had told her the story, that’s the part that had seemed particularly heinous to Clarke. Her obvious contempt was unfeigned.

Dani’s face paled, and she turned to Marko in anger. “You…you told these people?”

Marko shrugged. “When would I have done that? You’ve been here every minute.”

“Actually, you did tell me, Marko, but it was awhile back,” Bellamy said carefully.

He watched while confusion played across the man’s face until finally the penny dropped.

“You were one of those on that metal ring. And apparently listening to our conversations.” His tone was unsettled, as though it had suddenly occurred to him to wonder what else they might have heard.

“Bingo,” Bellamy nodded. “And it didn’t sound like a lot of your people know about what Dani did before she left,” he added quietly. He glanced over at one of the guards stationed by the ship, suggesting casually, “Would you like me to call that guy over right now and fill him in?”

A tense silence followed. When he saw Dani’s mouth open at last, Bellamy could only hope his ploy had worked.

“What is it that you want?” she ground out through gritted teeth.

“One of your digging machines,” Clarke said immediately.

Dani frowned in confusion. “But…none of them work.”

Clarke shrugged. “You let us worry about that.”

“Very well,” Dani said, but her face told them they were idiots. “And… is that all?” _All you want for keeping your mouths shut?_

“That’s it,” Clarke told her. “But we’ll take it right now.”

While the miners gaped, she radioed Raven to bring the truck around.

“You must have a way to get it outside. I suggest you get going. I’m not feeling especially patient today.”

Bellamy had wondered how they were going to move the digger, even if the miners went for it, but Raven had seemed confident. Especially when she found that the Eligius Mining Company had made ultra-light-weight equipment specifically for off-Earth use. So with a couple of wheels, a few logs, and some heavy chains, they’d fashioned a makeshift cargo bed that Raven told him would be strong enough for the digger.

“Uh, does anyone want some lessons in how to operate this thing?” The question came from one of the men who’d worked to roll the digger off the ship.

“Bellamy?”

He heard Murphy’s questioning tone, looked over and saw his raised brows, and nodded. “It couldn’t hurt.”

When the lesson had been completed and the digger was at last chained to the truck, Dani made her demand.

“So what about the lab? How can we find it?”

Bellamy already knew what Clarke was going to say. They’d batted it back and forth for days, because despite everything that had happened, they both understood that helping the miners was the right thing to do. After everything that had happened, the very last thing they wanted was any more deaths laid at their door.

“I’m not going to tell you how to find the lab,” Clarke said calmly.

Dani’s face was red with fury and Marko looked outraged.

“What the hell?” he said angrily.

“Just telling you how to get there wouldn’t help you. There are…too many obstacles. So three days from now, Bellamy and I are going to take you there ourselves. But just a couple of you. Once you see what’s there, you can decide to stay…or not. Up to you. I suggest you send your best medical people.”

“That would be me,” Dani said tightly. “Our only real doctor died ages ago and I’m the only one who knows anything about what’s been happening to us.”

Bellamy sighed. Of course she was.

Clarke nodded. “We’ll be here just after first light in three days. Pack enough provisions for several days. And don’t be late.”

The sour expression on Dani’s face told them that she still didn’t trust them, but that she understood if she wanted to save her people she had little choice in the matter.

When they returned to the cave, Murphy and Echo jumped quickly out of the rover, but Bellamy stopped Clarke with a hand to her arm before she could open her door.

“What is it?” she asked, her smile soft.

Bellamy knew it might be pointless to even bring it up, but still, it was weighing on him.

“Things went well today,” he acknowledged quietly. “We got them to give us what we needed.”

Clarke nodded, waiting for him to continue.

“But…using Dani’s actions against her, didn’t that make you feel a little like…like a hypocrite? I mean, our hands aren’t exactly clean.”

Clarke eyed him calmly. “Bellamy, I would never have shot my father…or you, your mother.”

He shrugged. “Maybe not. But we’re still responsible for a lot of deaths. And some of those were other peoples’ mothers, other peoples’ fathers.”

Clarke looked thoughtful and he knew she was considering his words.

“That’s all true,” she acknowledged finally, “but even if the things we did can never be explained away, or forgiven, or even understood, I think…it doesn’t matter now. What’s done is done. And today…today all we did was use a piece of information to force some cooperation so that a lot of people could _live_. Nothing we did put any lives at risk. No one will die. We’re taking them to the lab, helping them solve their problem, and at the same time our people are going to get help, too. We needed that digger, and if we had to use a little blackmail to get it, I have no problem with that.”

“Yeah, I know you’re right, but…”

“Bellamy, stop,” she said quietly, reaching out to grasp his hand. “When we first got to the ground, we had to make some impossible decisions, and…sometimes people ended up dying. But I’ve finally realized that it serves no purpose for me to live my life wallowing in guilt. Because now I have Madi, and…and you, and I’d rather prove that I deserve to live by helping people. By living a good life. I want to be allowed, for once, to feel happy.”

Clarke’s lips twisted into a wry smile. “Come on. They probably need our help with the digger.”

Bellamy nodded, swinging around to open the door, his mind in chaos.

_Was there really a chance that after everything that had happened, everything that he’d done, he might be allowed to be happy?_

XXXXXXXXXX

When Clarke and Bellamy arrived at the mining ship shortly after daybreak three days later, Dani and Marko were waiting outside. Dani hesitated getting into the rover, but when Marko murmured something in her ear, she finally slid into the back seat.

Bellamy supposed Marko might have told her _We have no choice_ , or _I’ll watch your back_ , but he preferred to think it was something more like _Don’t worry, everything will be fine._ He didn’t mind being seen as a little intimidating when the occasion called for it, but he hated to think he might actually be feared.

He hadn’t been sure how much to pack in the way of provisions. It was already a long ride to the island and they had no idea what new obstacles they might encounter as a result of praimfaya. So he’d stuffed in what he thought he could reasonably carry, and let it go at that.

He had asked Clarke how they’d get across the water, since the boat would have disintegrated just like everything else in praimfaya’s path, and she’d shown him a small raft she’d built for use on the river.

“The island isn’t as far from shore as it was before,” she explained. “It will be enough.”

The look on her face as she’d talked about the change in the shoreline had had Bellamy wondering aloud if she should even return.

“I can take them myself,” he’d offered. “Or maybe Raven could come with me. She spent more time in that lab than anyone else.”

“No,” she’d said immediately, her expression blank, “I was there a lot longer. And besides, Raven has to finish fixing the solar panels and get the digger working.”

She’d given him a tiny smile then, and squeezed his hand. “Please don’t worry about me.”

_Right. She might just as well ask him not to breathe._

“And Madi?”

Clarke had chuckled. “Will be thrilled to be get to spend more time with Emori.”

Madi and Emori had taken a shine to each other, and Bellamy thought the relationship was probably good for them both.

“Good. Emori needs more happy things in her life.”

Clarke’s smile had turned fond, and brought a lump to his throat.

“You took good care of them all, Bellamy,” she’d said softly.

But when she’d said goodbye to Madi that morning before the sun had even fully risen, enveloping the girl in a tight hug, he wondered again if Clarke could bear to leave her. He knew that this would be their first time away from each other since she’d found Madi five years ago. Bellamy thought the parting would probably be harder on Clarke than on Madi, and he understood that completely.

“ _Nou worry, Clarke. Ai wil be fin_.” Madi had said it over and over, but Bellamy wondered if Clarke really believed it.

Maybe that was why she was so quiet now, why she’d said hardly a word since they picked up their passengers.

“Are you okay?” he asked gently. “Missing Madi?”

Clarke turned to him with a soft smile. “Of course,” she nodded, “but she’s well taken care of and…I’ll be back soon. I’m fine,” she assured him, squeezing his arm. “Really I am.”

By the time they stopped to eat after several hours of steady driving, they had long since left behind the small patch of green where Clarke made her home. Bellamy had heard the gasps from their passengers when they moved onto the kind of scorched-Earth landscape that now covered most of the planet.

The countryside was so bleak and uninviting, in fact, that they chose to eat in the rover, rather than sit amongst the withered trees and charred remains of long-dead animals. It would all come back to life, he knew. Once again be green and living. Productive.

But it wasn’t going to happen in his lifetime.

Clarke’s eyes narrowed when she saw how little the others had brought for the midday meal, and he recalled that they’d been running out of food just before they made it down to the planet. Once he explained their situation to Clarke, he was certain she’d be depleting her own precious stores to send them food.

Despite the desolate landscape, they encountered no actual obstacles, and by late afternoon they’d reached the shore. As Clarke had warned him, the ocean had receded so much that Becca’s island was scarcely a quarter mile from the beach.

“I don’t understand,” Dani said, when Clarke pulled the sturdy raft from the rover. “Where is the lab?”

“Out there on the island,” Clarke told her, cocking her head towards the water. “Unless you’re a damn good swimmer, I suggest you climb onto this raft.”

Dani’s reluctance was clear, but in the end she had little choice.

XXXXXXXXXX

Bellamy had wondered how he’d feel returning to the room where he’d been forced to make the most painful decision of his life. He knew if Clarke hadn’t survived after all, if she hadn’t been standing there right next to him, probably swamped by her own memories, it would have been unbearable. As it was, while he vividly remembered his anguish, he also felt a sense of disbelief and gratitude for the series of near-miraculous events that had ending up saving his life.

“Does this all still work?” Dani asked, her eyes widening at the array of equipment in the lab. Bellamy recalled that there had been even more, before it got carted off to the bunker or loaded onto the rocket.

Clarke shrugged. “It did when I left.”

She pressed a button and one of the computers sprang to life. “All the notes on nightblood and hypersleep are in here,” she said.

As she moved around the lab explaining the uses of the various equipment to Dani and Marko, Bellamy began to sense that Clarke’s apparent calm was a facade, held together by sheer force of will. And it suddenly came to him that at least for a while, she must have thought this place would become her grave.

But Clarke had always been incredibly strong, and this new version had been tempered by the kind of fires he could only imagine. So he watched as she continued to fulfill her promise, doing all she could to give their new neighbors every chance to figure out how to fix themselves.

 _What’s done is done_ , she’d told him. They could only prove they deserved to survive by living a good life. By helping others. Even, it seemed, when the others had pointed guns at you, and abducted your child.

Even in a place where your memories might eat you alive.

Still, he was not surprised to hear late the following afternoon that she’d finished ticking off the last box on her mental checklist.

“They’ve decided to stay for a while,” she told him. “They think the testing is going well, that they can find a cure. But I’ve helped them all I can, so we can leave in the morning.”

Bellamy peered at her closely, noting the strain around her eyes and the tightness of her mouth, and made a sudden decision.

“If you want, we can leave right now.”

“But it’s going to be dark soon…”

“Yeah, but we have enough time to grab the raft and make it to shore. We can sleep in the rover and start back at first light.”

“Are you sure?” she said, but he could already see the relief on her face.

He nodded. “Let’s leave most of our food here. I don’t think they brought enough.”

“I had the same thought.”

Dani was so engrossed in her mission that she barely reacted to their departure. As he watched her work, Bellamy thought about all the assumptions he’d made about Dani, and how they’d all been from a perspective of fear. Fear that she and her people were predatory, and hostile, and would try to interfere with their return to Earth.

But maybe there was another side to Dani’s story. Maybe she was just doing everything she could to save her people. No one knew better than Bellamy how concern for your loved ones could twist your mind into taking actions that you might otherwise find unthinkable. The idea of “no choice” could be insidious.

Bellamy doubted he could ever like Dani, but he thought maybe he’d begun to understand her, if only just a little.

“Someone will be back to get you in a week,” he told Marko, as he and Clarke stepped out into the twilight. “We’ll make another raft and get the solar panels fixed on one of your trucks by then.”

Marko nodded, his small smile wry. “This would have all gone a lot smoother if we’d just asked for what we needed, wouldn’t it? Even up in space when you were watching us fly around that metal ring.”

Bellamy shrugged. “I know how hard it is to trust strangers.”

As they paddled to shore, he watched the tension drain from Clarke’s body with every yard that separated them from the island. By the time they got to the rover, night had fallen and her eyes were drooping.

“Go to sleep,” he told her, after a quick meal of preserved meat, washed down with water from a shared canteen. “I know you hardly slept last night.”

She nodded, curling up in a thin blanket in the back of the rover. Bellamy stretched out beside her, carefully not touching her, but close enough to be there if she needed him. He awoke hours later, as the moon was rising, to find her draped across him, her head resting solidly on his shoulder.

Bellamy wrapped an arm around her, understanding more clearly than ever that no matter what happened, he was never going to be able to get her out of his heart.

XXXXXXXXXX

They left at dawn, and while Clarke seemed more rested, she was still unusually quiet. Bellamy almost always knew what was going on in Clarke’s head, even now, after six years. But not today. Today, her quiet reserve defeated him, and he was reluctant to upset her further with idle chatter.

By mid-afternoon, they reached the edge of Clarke’s haven of green, and he thought she might perk up a bit. But he’d no sooner eased onto the green patch when heard a quiet gasp.

“Bellamy, stop the truck.” Her voice was faint, and tinged with panic.

“What?” He knew she was anxious to get back to Madi, so it was the last thing he expected.

“Now! Stop it now!”

Her hand was already on the door handle, and as he slammed on the breaks, he was suddenly afraid she would try to jump out while the truck was still in motion. As it was, she barely waited for it to fully stop before she was out the door and running across the grass to fling herself down next to a new growth of pines.

He secured the truck as quickly as he could and then he was racing after her, dropping down beside her as she lay in the grass.

“Clarke! What is it? What’s wrong?”

When Bellamy reached out to stroke her arm, her breath hitched and a single sob escaped before she rolled into his side and burst into tears.

He wrapped an arm around her, wretched that she was in such pain, unsure how to help her.

“Please, Clarke. Tell me what it is.”

When she finally began to speak, her voice was low and frantic, and raspy from her tears.

“It’s just…it all came flooding back. Everything that happened to me in that place.” She squeezed her eyes against the painful memory. “I ran and ran as fast as I could, but I couldn’t completely outrun praimfaya. By the time I got back inside the lab, my face and body were covered with burns and and blisters, and I was in agony.”

Bellamy felt the tears spring to his own eyes. He rocked her in his arms as she choked on her memories.

“I’m so damn sorry, Clarke. That you had to go through that. How the _hell_ could I have left you behind? Dammit! I should have made them wait just a _little_ longer.”

Guilt and pain warred for mastery within him, and his heart filled with compassion for all that Clarke had been through. He ached to be able to take it all away, the pain that she’d suffered, even her memory of it. But he knew that was beyond him. All he could do for her now was hold her. And listen.

She pulled back to gaze up at him, shaking her head.

“No! You couldn’t have waited. You wouldn’t have been able to launch before before praimfaya hit.”

“But just a few seconds could have made the difference!” It was what he’d been agonizing over for years.

“It wasn’t a few seconds, Bellamy. It was much longer than that. I-I had to climb that satellite tower.”

_“What!”_

“The panel at the bottom wasn’t working, but I knew I had to get it done, to make sure you could communicate with the Ark. Otherwise…otherwise I knew you’d all suffocate and die, and I wasn’t going to let that happen. So…I climbed the tower and shifted the satellite by hand.”

“Christ!” He could hardly believe what he was hearing. The damn thing was a hundred feet high.

“And it worked! Then I slid down and ran like hell, but I wasn‘t quite fast enough. The very edge of praimfaya caught me just before I made it into the lab.”

“You should never have taken such a stupid chance, Clarke! It wasn’t worth it. And then you had to suffer all that pain.” Bellamy was appalled. “You should have just… saved yourself!”

“I _did_ save myself,” she reminded him, “and it was worth it, because I also saved _you_ , and that was more important.”

“The hell it _was_!” That was _never_ going to be true.

“But then later, when you didn’t answer my messages, I thought,” Clarke let out a deep breath, “I thought I hadn’t been quick enough after all. That I’d gone through all that, and you’d died anyway.”

Bellamy felt sick at heart. “Communication was impossible at first. In either direction. Then…later…we could hear you but had no way to respond. I wanted to make trying to build some comms a priority, so you’d know that we were alive. So you wouldn’t worry. But…I couldn’t. It was more important to…everyone else to get off the ring and get back here before we all went nuts.”

He sighed, remembering. “And then we had so many problems, got delayed…”

Clarke stopped him then, placing two fingers gently against his lips.

“Don’t, Bellamy. None of it is your fault and it doesn’t matter now, anyway. You’re here now. Everything happened just like it was supposed to,”

He grabbed at her fingers, squeezing them tightly. “How can you say that! After what you suffered.”

“Because look where we are now!” She was so earnest, in that Clarke-like way she had. The way that meant she was absolutely certain she was right. “If things hadn’t happened in exactly that way, we wouldn’t be here together now. Sitting on this grass. You… you wouldn’t be holding my hand,” she said, gazing down at where her fingers were still locked in his palm.

She turned her hand in his, interlacing their fingers, then used that leverage to pull herself closer.

“I missed you so much,” she said softly, reaching up with her free hand to scratch gently at the back of his neck.

Bellamy felt his breath go short. She was so close to him, only inches away. And she was touching him. It felt so good.

As their eyes locked, he could only breathe her name. “Clarke…”

“If you weren’t here with me now, I couldn’t be doing this,” she whispered, pulling his head down to brush her lips softly across his.

Bellamy’s world suddenly ground to a halt, telescoped narrowly down to the here and now. There was no time but this moment, no place but this small grassy field. It felt like one of his old dreams, but the touch of Clarke’s lips was very, very real.

His body froze for the tiniest of moments before suddenly coming to life. Then he threw himself into the kiss, deepening it, wrapping her in his arms, crushing her against his body. Soon they were lying side by side on the grass, as years of mutual longing was unleashed in a kiss so passionate that it seemed like nothing save a new cataclysm could have pulled them apart.

“I dreamed of this,” he gasped, coming up for air. “Back on the Ark. For a while, you visited me every night in my dreams.”

“And what happened in those dreams?” she whispered, peppering his face with soft kisses.

“This,” he said, when he could tear himself from her lips. “You’d be kissing me just like this.”

“Nothing else?” Clarke asked, and when he heard her sultry tone, Bellamy felt himself become painfully hard. Then she was rubbing herself against him.

“Sometimes this happened, too,” he rasped, pushing her jacket down her arms and pulling off her shirt. She tugged at the hem of his shirt and he dragged it over his head. Then he lay on his back and pulled her fully on top of him.

“Wait,” she said softly, unclasping her bra and tossing it aside.

Bellamy groaned with desire as he wrapped her in his arms and felt the press of her hardened nipples against his chest. It was exactly like one of his old dreams…and nothing like them at all. Because Clarke was alive, and in his arms, and it seemed to be just where she wanted to be.

Then they were kissing again, open-mouthed and frantic, their tongues sliding against each other wantonly.

“I need,” she moaned. “I want.”

“What do you need? What do you want?” He could hardly get the words out.

“You.”

She palmed him through his jeans and began to squeeze gently.

“Clarke,” he warned, pulling her hand away, “I’m so turned on right now, and that…that feels too good.”

“Yeah? I never would have known.” Her smile was teasing.

“I think we need to get rid of these,” he said, unbuttoning and unzipping her jeans.

In the next second, she was pulling off her boots before dragging her jeans and panties down her legs. Then she lay back on the grass, her eyes half-lidded, her mouth wet and swollen from his kisses.

“Oh, god,” he said, fumbling ineffectually with his own clothing, unable to take his eyes off the goddess that was Clarke Griffin, lying next him on the grass.

She reached inside his pants and briefly took him fully in her hand. “Now would be a good time, Bellamy.”

He kicked off his pants and boots, and pulled her to him, kissing her madly. Their arms wrapped tightly around one another, their legs intertwined, and they began to move together in a way that was utterly instinctive. Full-bodied skin-on-skin contact driving them wild with desire.

But soon enough, she needed more

“Inside me,” she said suddenly, dragging his fingers down and across her wetness, making him understand how much she wanted him.

“Yes,” he breathed, flipping her onto her back a little roughly, spreading her legs widely, and entering her in one hard stroke.

It was almost too much, how good it felt. His dreams of ecstasy with phantom Clarke were nothing compared to the reality of being inside the beautiful, sensual woman in his arms.

He’d never in his life felt anything like this. Never felt so connected to another human being. It was affection and desire, love and lust. And so much more.

They hadn’t yet invented the word for everything he and Clarke were together.

Soon enough, Bellamy’s movements became frenzied, and he wasn’t sure how long he could hold out. Then he felt Clarke stiffen beneath him. She groaned loudly as she climaxed, her body arching into it.

The sensation was overwhelming. He came inside her, longer and harder than he ever remembered.

Bellamy collapsed on top of Clarke, then rolled them both onto their sides so as not to crush her under his weight. He gathered her against him, but he didn’t pull out of her body, not yet willing to break the connection.

She wound her arms around his neck, silent for a moment before she whispered in his ear, “We should have done that a long time ago.”

Bellamy chuckled. “I’ve only been back six days,” he reminded her.

“No,” she said, pulling back to look at him. “I meant…before. When we were here together the last time.”

“Ah,” he said, smiling. “I’d have been happy to fuck you pretty much from the moment I met you. But…it wouldn’t have been the same. And then, there was so much going on, and we needed… _not_ to be like this with each other. It would have…complicated things. Made everything we needed to do…harder.”

Clarke was nodding. “I know all that. But…later. When we knew praimfaya was coming. Then…then it would have meant something. At least…to me.”

“To me, too,” he agreed softly, “it would have meant…everything. But we waited too long. And then…time just ran out.”

“Yeah, I think the world came to an end or something.” Half-teasing irony.

“Yep, that’s how I remember it, too.”

They were quiet for a moment, and when he finally slipped out from inside her, she pushed him back and settled against his side, her head resting on his broad shoulder.

“But now that we’ve done this…” she began tentatively.

“Now that we’ve done this we’re never gonna stop,” he said fiercely.

Bellamy wasn’t sure how he’d deal with it if she felt differently, but then she turned to look up at him and her small smile reassured him.

“I don’t want to stop, either,” she said. “In fact, I don’t know if I could. I have the feeling sex with Bellamy Blake might be addictive.”

Bellamy laughed, and it felt good. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d really laughed. But then he thought maybe he ought to make his intentions perfectly clear.

“But…it’s not just the sex,” he told her, fingering a strand of fine blonde hair. “I want to be with you in every way.”

“That’s what I want, too,” she smiled, brushing an errant curl off his forehead. “But six years is a long time. I thought things might have…changed for you.”

Bellamy huffed wryly. “Even when I thought you were dead, I couldn’t seem to forget you. I just figured it would take…a long time. But then, when I realized you were still alive…” He shook his head, chuckled. “That was a great day. But you can ask them. I was so happy, I acted like a lunatic. You can’t imagine how I felt.”

“I can imagine you felt exactly like I did a few days ago when I saw you on that ship,” she said, her smile fond.

“Maybe,” he said, picking up her hand and planting a soft kiss on her palm. “But I haven’t seen any signs of lunacy. Unless it’s wanting to be with me.”

“That doesn’t make me a lunatic,” she said, reaching up to caress his cheek. “That just makes me happy.” She grinned saucily. “The sex is just the icing on the cake.”

“Speaking of which…” He pressed into her as he felt himself begin to harden against her leg.

“You are insatiable,” she laughed. But her hand moved down to grasp him and he hissed with pleasure.

“Is there any reason why we need to get back today,” he muttered softly, leaning over her. “Did you promise Madi or anything?”

She shook her head, sighing. “Madi is in good hands. I think we could maybe wait until tomorrow.”

“Yeah,” he murmured, pulling her in for a kiss. “That’s exactly what I was thinking.”

XXXXXXXXXX

By the time they got back late the following afternoon, Bellamy thought they might just be satiated. For the moment at least. He laughed to himself, thinking of Clarke calling him insatiable, when she was at least as likely as he to initiate sex.

Not that it mattered who did what, or when. Turned out they were just as attuned to each other sexually as they’d always been in every other aspect of their relationship.

He stopped the rover and turned to kiss her briefly just as they came in sight of the cave.

“What should we tell them?” he asked.

Clarke laughed. “Unless Raven has changed a lot, we won’t need to say a thing.”

“You’ve probably got that right,” he grinned, shifting back into gear and heading toward the cave.

The others had clearly been looking for them, and as soon as he parked the rover, Madi came hurtling out of nowhere, barely letting Clarke get out of the truck before throwing her arms around her. She pulled out of Clarke’s embrace, all ready to regale her with a recap of her recent adventures when something about her mother’s expression caught her eye.

 _“Why laik yu happy, Clarke?”_ Madi asked, her face alight with curiosity.

Clarke’s glance toward Bellamy was instinctive. And also a dead giveaway.

“Oh, my god, Blake, did you actually get to it?” Raven laughed, reaching up to punch him in the shoulder. “About time.”

Bellamy shrugged and reached out for Clarke’s hand. “Long past time, I’d say.”

“Okay, so tell me when we’re done with all the happy shit so we can talk about important stuff.” Murphy was his usual sardonic self.

“What important stuff?” Bellamy dragged himself out of his personal euphoria with some difficulty. “What’s going on?”

“I fixed the solar panels on the digger,” Raven said, “and then we left it to charge for a day. Murphy started it up this morning and…it works!”

Bellamy could hardly believe it.

He and Clarke looked at each other and he knew they were thinking the same thing. Well, almost the same thing. Clarke was no doubt thinking _Abby_ , while he was thinking _Octavia_.

“How far is it from here to where Polis used to stand?” he asked Clarke.

“Distance, I’m not sure, but it’s several hours in the rover.”

“And even longer for something slow like the digger.” he said, nodding.

“We need to make a plan…” Raven began.

“You’re right, but first you’re gonna fix one of the trucks for those miners.”

“I am?” Raven asked, confused.

“Yes.” It was Clarke who answered. “We’ll get our people out of that bunker, but we’re also gonna help the miners get back and forth to the lab, so they can figure out how to solve their medical problem.”

“Okaaaaay.” Raven drew out the word to underscore her confusion.

Bellamy sighed, twisting his head to search all their faces. “How many people do you think are left in this area? Probably not more than a couple thousand, including a few we may not know about. Do we really want to start splintering off into small groups that are at each others’ throats all the time? Wouldn’t it be better to try to make friends, to work together? Maybe prove that we can do it right for once?”

“Sounds like a good plan to me,” Monty said, while Raven shrugged and nodded.

“Good.” Bellamy nodded. “Is there anyone here who is _not_ for this plan? Anyone who still thinks it’s better to spend our time figuring out how to kill each other, instead of learning how to live together?”

Their smiles were quiet as they shook their heads. He hadn’t really thought otherwise, but it was still a relief to find they were all on the same page.

Bellamy looked down when he felt Clarke squeezing him with the hand he’d grabbed earlier and never let go of.

“Good speech,” she said. “Can we eat now? I think I’ll need some fuel if we’re going to be working on a plan to restart civilization.”

Bellamy knew Clarke was half-joking, but still, her words gave him a jolt. Was that really what they were doing? Was every action they took, every decision they made, going to reverberate down the centuries?

He scratched his head, unable to conceive of it.

But if it _was_ true, he hoped to hell they figured out how to make it work a whole lot better than the last bunch.


End file.
